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Posts tagged review
CopOut
Mar 7th
I decided to splurge and take in a movie today. I wanted something light and funny so opted for CopOut over the heavier Alice (and thank gawd I didn’t chose that one – every family in Tempe did) or Avatar.
Let me say, I love Bruce Willis. I’d watch him do anything, even change the oil in his car. I especially like him in things with a sense of humor. He smiles and I smile; he laughs and I laugh. He’s usually the star of my midnight fantasies, those not starring Nic Cage. Not that he’s bad at playing bad, mind you. Just, you know, mmmMMMmmm.
And I really like Kevin Smith. Maybe not so much his movies – yet I sort of watched some Jay and Silent Bob movie last night – but I never miss a SMODcast and I’d love to just hang out with the man. He’s damned explicitly funny. But this didn’t really feel like a Kevin Smith movie. Maybe because I just get sucked into anything Bruce Willis does, I dunno.
Anyway, I laughed my ass off at this movie. Tracy Morgan almost was too much for me. I’m a little old for slapstick overboard stupid comedy, but he pulled it back just enough when the story needed to be more serious. Just when I would get bored with his antics, the scene would change. Nice editing, Kevin. But overall the movie was funny as hell. Go for a good time.
The only problem I had with this movie was the casting of Poh Boy. Usually when there’s a bad guy, especially when he’s supposed to be the leader attempting to take over x-amount of someone else’s territory, he looks the part. This guy didn’t look the part. He wasn’t the least bit scary to me, a middle-aged chunky midwestern Mom. He put out a flunky vibe in a part that should have called for a more intimidating character. Much darker instead of what we got. I half expected his peons to roll their eyes behind his back. But the baseball torture cage was inventive!
Should I start using some sort of judging thing? Stars… nah, too bland. Hmmm, how about a four FuckYeah! rating?
NotReallyCamping
Nov 16th
Friday was Phoenix WordCamp. It’s where everybody roasts Blogger buttons around a campfire and chants WordPress, WordPress, WordPress. Nah, not really. I don’t even know why these things are called camps! There are no tents, fires, or s’mores. Wait, WordCamp was held in a tent! One of those humongous commercial semi-permanent tents with A/C. And we had sack (picnic?) lunches.
Anyway, it was a day filled with WordPress information. It started off with some woman I’ve never heard of calling her self the Diva of WordPress and yet preaching “we don’t care if you have bad spelling or grammar, we just want to hear what you have to say!” Cue immediate disrespectful twittering from many people. Then another all-about-me presenter and more cranky twittering. Then some kid who looked 12 but seemed to know a lot. The morning was filled with more motivational type speakers – all about content. The afternoon leaned more to the technical side, the guy who created WordPress in the first place, and local WordPress magicians Chuck Reynolds and Josh Strebel had a Q&A panel. Another guy got all geeky with step-by-step widget coding that was way over my head. Merlin Mann was highly entertaining, and Brent Spore was great. All-in-all a nice motivational day, but not what I expected. Props to my friend Chuck for organizing the 500 seat sold-out WordCamp.
Saturday and Sunday were this year’s PodCampAZ, the one I’m involved in planning. I spent most of Saturday working registration with Rachel so I got to meet lots of new people. I helped Evo with his panel (I clicked the slide advance button) and helped set-up and take down. Yesterday I set up registration, but spent more time in actual panels. Brent’s panel on social media almost immediately got intense when the packed room divided between the let’s-keep-it-to-ourselves side and the we-need-to-bring-in-new-people-side. He wanted to get people talking and it certainly did. Another friend Katie had a panel on social media but it was more what you should and should not put out there. The best panel I went to was a WordPress panel, where Josh skimmed over the best settings and must-have widgets and plugins – which was the information I’d been looking for from WordCamp.
So expect some changes to this site as soon as I’m rested up. I’m still tired as hell and I have a lot of notes to expand on while the information is fresh. We all learned that GeekWeek is toooooo much at one time. Information overload + planning anxiety + RL stress = exhaustion. There were other conferences earlier in the week that some people attended too. Thursday was the Entrepreneurship Conference, there was a design camp somewhere and I think one other thing and some people hit them all. Each event was successful but running them all within a week is too much which is likely why the PodCampAZ ending wasn’t attended by as many people as we expected. Our numbers were much lower than registered though there were a lot of walk-ins.
I was surprised at how many of our speakers failed to show up! When I checked with our speaker coordinator Lawrence, only about half of the n0-shows bothered to contact him with an explanation beforehand. It’s fucking rude as HELL to have a roomful of people waiting for you and not show up.
Really? Is that what that is?
Sep 30th
Can you identify what this object is?
Can you?
How about this one: 
I follow this web site called Contemporist. Though the houses they show are sometimes very interesting, there’s no way I could live in a place so stark and uncluttered as a contemporary house. There’s no way I’d want most of the furniture shown there either. Most of that stuff looks horribly uncomfortable. It is interesting… but not very practical. These are both stools. Seriously, if you walked into an empty room and these were the only things in there, would you KNOW they were to sit upon?
Doubtful.
These are beautiful and practical. This is very cool. And if you go over there be sure to check out the lighting section, too.
The Guild
Sep 30th
First, first you need to see this video if you haven’t already. It actually stands alone but it’s more fun after you’ve caught up on the web series…
Okay, now that you’ve got this stuck in your head go find The Guild. All season 1 and 2 episodes are available on YouTube. Season 3 has started, but you have to go here to this crappy portal to get them and I don’t like how it’s set up so I won’t name them. Each episode is about 6ish minutes long so it’s not like you’ll waste a lot of time. Wil Wheaton is guesting on Season 3! If you’ve ever been a gamer or like me, just friends with one, you should check out this web series. It’s adorkable.
FIVE OUT OF FIVE!
Emmy Snark
Sep 21st
Let’s see if I can sneak in some snark while SmallChild is napping:
- I like the new setup. No snark there, just being honest.
- Steve Buscemi’s teeth, hilarious!
- Is mirror girl (winner) for real or is she trying and failing to be funny?
- Neal Patrick Harris is great at this!
- Is Justin Timberlake trying to ugly himself up? Those glasses!
- I don’t find mustache girl at all funny. Silverwear? Silverstone?
- Toni Collette is too thin.
- I really like the backstage camera shots.
- I don’t watch 30 Rock. Is Alec Baldwin really that funny?
- That clip beating up the dog? No so funny. Another show I don’t watch.
- I could live without the montages before each genre. We know what the frakking shows are.
- Of all the outfits that chick could wear, she chose that? Looks like a cheap bathroom rug. Are those other dancers from reality shows, too?
- Jeff Probst is hot. Not hot enough to watch Survivor for, but hot.
- You could park an ice road truck in those dimples.
- Tracy dude isn’t funny.
- Patricia Arquette looks uncomfortable as hell.
- Here’s the boobs! Wow that dress is even more unflattering in motion.
- Dr. Horrible is the best thing ever!
- I’ve never heard of these movies. What channel were they on?
- Hey blond girl next to Kiefer, that’s an ugly dress.
- I actually like that pinky/purple dress. Should be long enough to cover those ugly shoes though.
- YouTwitFace. Love it!
- OOoh I like her dress, too. Goes with the two-tone hair.
- Fallon wasn’t funny either.
- Hey, that drama montage actually showed a scene from BSG! Some respect!
- I think Michael Emerson’s might be the most deserved Emmy of the night. He is phenomenal.
- Teary time. Goosebumps.
- I love the Lost writers. They’re so funny on their podcast.
- Sorry Glenn, props for your entire career, but that dress is awful.
- “I like a man who delivers week after week” Amen sister.
All right, I’m done. Nice show.
Last Night's Emmy Awards
Sep 21st
I didn’t get to do my usual snarky play-by-play on twitter last night. Everyone was here having spaghetti and yakking and though I had it on, I didn’t get to pay a lot of attention. But I’d had a heads-up to really watch around the hour and a half mark so I sent everyone out just in time to see…
Some woman to win the Emmy for directing a movie I’ve never heard of. Which is probably a great thing for her except OMG all I could think of was what a shame about her boobs. I mean, it’s international TV and she LOOKED LIKE SHIT.
She went on stage like that! Except as she was giving her acceptance speech her right nipple was pointing somewhere off stage and her left nipple was rolled up. THAT’S ALL YOU COULD SEE!
*AHEM* If you’re going to wear this type of dress and there’s even a remote possibility that you’re going to win the award, here’s a hint. Just before your category you should pull your sagging boobs up and adjust the cupping part of the dress to actually… you know… CUP THE BOOBS!
Congratulations Dearbhla! Tough luck all press photos of your life-changing event will … I just don’t know how to finish that sentence.
And right after that there was a skit involving the Accounting Team of WhoTheFuckCares being interrupted by Dr. Horrible. Unfortunately I missed most of the dialogue cuz Kira picked up on the “Muahahahha” and kept repeating it loudly over and over. I’m sure it was excellent as is ALL Dr. Horrible material. Good thing I have the whole show recorded. I may come back and make more comments here once I get rid of SmallChild for the night.
Actually, she did a pretty good imitation of that evil laugh.
All the single ladies my ass
Sep 16th
So just for shits and giggles I decided to watch the five nominated Best Female Videos to see if Kanye West had a point. I mean, I had to go look for them HERE because I don’t see a lot of videos in my life. Didn’t there used to be a whole cable channel devoted to music videos?
- Taylor Swift’s “You Belong To Me.” Won? It’s a cute little video where nerd girl wants boy, boy has cheerleader, cheerleader shits on boy, boy sees nerd girl, love. Wasn’t that a movie a few years ago?
- Beyonce’s “Single Ladies” makes no fucking sense at all. She’s singing a song to the single ladies to get a ring on it before… what? Can’t understand half the words and I ain’t looking them up. The point is, she’s singing to the ladies yet dancing half naked to entice all the single men. Or boys rather. Mixed message anyone? Female empowerment my sweet patootie.
- Katy Perry’s “Hot and Cold” is an amusing video. At least the story goes with the song and it looked like fun, but it seemed kind of ’80s to me.
- Kelly Clarkson’s “My Life Would Suck Without You” may have had a story to it, but it was more close-ups of her face. Why bother trying to make a story video if you’re not going to show the story?
- Lady Gaga’s “Poker Face” was at least visually stimulating. Lots of sparkles and costumes and interesting camera shots.
- Pink’s “So What” actually had a real story to it, and seemed completely in character to what little I know of Pink’s actual life. I could see her having this kind of a meltdown and that made it fun.
Kanye should stop talking with/as his dick. Sure Beyonce is beautiful and talented, but that video was a waste. She looks like a jerking Barbie Doll and shakes her ass. That’s it. Nothing to do with the actual song as demonstrated here with someone’s edited version (thanks Iain).
I would have picked Pink’s as the best of that bunch, hands down. She’s kicking ass and chainsawing down trees. Now that’s female empowerment!
Tips for proper parenting
Jul 15th
Number 1. Don’t take your toddler to a midnight movie, opening night. Stupid stupid stupid parent. That kid should have been in bed. And had you actually sat in the seats in front of us I would have let you know exactly how I felt about your judgement.
Number 2. Don’t bully in front of other cars in the parking lot after a midnight movie. This teaches your child (and there were two small children in the back of this SUV) how to be rude and pushy and might just show them how to pass the time when the police arrive.
Seriously, after the Harry Potter thing last night (comments about that to follow) there was the mass exodus of people from maybe a dozen of the AMC Mesa Grand 24 theaters. I let four cars into the queue in front of me when across the parking lot comes some bitch in her SUV plowing her front end right in front of me! Her windows open, my windows open, I’m yelling “BITCH” “RUDE ASS FUCKTARD” and as she inches further into my space I see little children in the back so I’m yelling “Great Parenting Skills There You FUCKING COW” and the man in the passenger seat is completely ignoring me. Had we had any of Ginnie’s soda left I’d have chucked it at her goddam car. Had I still had that crappy Land Rover I’d have rammed the bitch. What is the fucking point of that?
So anyway, because I am the perfect parent *snicker* I took Ginnie to the midnight:20 viewing of Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince. Though I read this series a few years ago and have seen the previous movies I was left confused as hell. First, why call it the Half Blood Prince if you’re not going to fully explain the significance? Gee the potions book had all the answer written in and surprise, it’s THAT character. None of the background was there. And second (and neither Ginnie or I can ever remember the exact sequence of events) why have the death eaters show up at that time just to watch that one part and break a few things and leave? Wasn’t there more happening at that point? This movie was like eating a crappy pizza when you see really good ones just out of reach. I give it a 3 out of 5 stars.
Mr. Deity
Jun 28th
If you’ve never seen an episode of Mr. Deity, YOU MUST GO THERE NOW and start from the beginning. Short but hilarious. I love this show. Actually, watch the latest episode, “Mr Deity and the Book Part Deux” and that will hook you.
Subscribe on iTunes. Sit through all the prior seasons. It just gets better and better. I recommended this show a couple of years ago in my LJ and have kept up ever since.
If you decide you don’t like it, please tell me why. I’m interested to know who of my readers doesn’t find this even slightly amusing enough to subscribe.
War, Inc. – my review
May 24th
I finally got around to watching this DVD last night. I’m a fan of John Cusack, but I’m glad I waited to rent (netflix) this rather than paying full price at a theater.
War, Inc is Grosse Pointe Blank years later with Idiocracy slathered on top. Not the stupid people part (though there was a fair amount of stupid people) but the advertising part. They should have just reused the name Martin Blank and his assistant Marcella and wrote it as a sequel.
Because it’s a movie about a (corporate) hit-man who is burnt out and he meets a woman and shit happens and they end up together. And Dan Aykroyd is in it, too.
Remember the fight scene in the school hallway in GPB? Almost exactly duplicated including the killing the other guy with a non-weapon part. There he used a pen and here he used an air-injecting wine bottle opener. At least I think that’s what it was. AND “the girl” comes in at the end and sees it and runs away, then he has to save her from the bad guys… almost a GPB retread.
And I hate watching fight scenes with John Cusack. It’s like watching a Giraffe do slow-motion karate… poorly. He’s so much better at dialogue and humor.
Final verdict: don’t bother.
| Originally published at Spellwight. |
