No, not that one.

Casey has this buddy. I think I’ve mentioned him before. He used to babysit Kira right after Venus left. Nice guy. All the years I’ve known him he’s been either homeless and flopping on somebody’s couch or off living with some new woman. Can barely hold a job and I don’t know why, maybe it’s his general laid-back attitude about life or something. Just your average never-gonna-amount-to-nothing guy. Barely in his 40′s and from what I’ve been told:

Hung like a horse.

So over the last week he’s been hanging around, and we’ve decided to drive Casey nuts. I flirt, he flirts back. I’ll bend over to pick up toys right in front of him and he’ll appreciate the view – just so Casey gets mad. Stuff like that. We keep joking that he’s going to move in here to service Mom though I keep saying I just want sex, not a relationship. He stayed here over the weekend and Casey went bananas making sure we stayed away from each other. His other friends are getting in on the game, too. Jake wants to know if I’m planning a take-a-number board. It’s just too funny.

Poor Casey is now convinced we really mean it. Has threatened Ed’s life. And now every innocent comment sets it all off again. Ed offered Casey a clean shirt and I said I wanted it! It’s long and I wanted it for a nightshirt! Seriously. I’m wearing it right now. Hangs down to my knees, which might give you an idea of how tall Ed is. Casey left this afternoon kind of mad at me. Told me I’d better not ever have sex with any of his friends, especially Ed.

Damn. Hung like a horse. Tempted!