Telling it like I see it
so don't ask if you don't want to know
Weird Dream #514
Feb 27th
I’m driving just across town with an infant in a carseat… but she’s in the drivers seat and I’m sitting in the middle toe-ing the brake and untangling the bassinet ribbons from the steering wheel. But its only snowing a little. Then a cop pulls up behind me so I toss the carseat into the backseat and he drives on by. Whew.
Then its dinner at someplace I assume is my moms (never been there) and her second husband (who has actually been dead for um, 14? years). Plus Max and Ginnie and my good friend Cara and her 9-year-old daughter (she actually has an adult son) and my Ex. Nice meal – Ex serves but never sits or speaks.
Then we are outside on a patio overlooking what should be a beautiful yard but it’s flooded with river water. Suddenly the water drains away, Max and the kid go out in the yard she falls down and Max steps on a small owl running to help her up because suddenly she is 3. The owl pops right back up and mom says her antenna is under the coffee can.
WTF.
Dear Christians, STFU.
Feb 6th
This post sprang to mind after seeing this comment on a Facebook thread about the (postponed) vote to let gays in the Boy Scouts.
If you saw someone choking to death—most would try to save their life——–Christians try to save people from going to hell (spiritual death)(seperation from GOD)——-by telling them about Jesus Christ!!—-Start by googling John 3:16-18
Let me ‘splain something to you. If you see someone choking to death I hope you do more than tell them about Jesus. I’m pretty sure that wouldn’t help them AT ALL. In fact, I’m pretty sure the average person knows enough about Jesus to make their own decision to find out more… or not. That’s how learning works. The person has to go find out what they want to know.
If I want to know about insurance, I go see an insurance agent.
If I want to know about my car, I go see a mechanic.
If I want to know about anything at all, I go to people who know more about it than I.
I guarantee you if a mechanic or an insurance agent or a religious person tries to sell me without my asking, I’m not buying. Pushy people are a turn-off. I might even like you as a person but the minute you try to sell me anything you’re out. Don’t come to my door, don’t approach me in public, don’t think for even a minute that you’re supposed to save me.
Just by looking at the comment above (and too many like it to count) I can see you’re not educated in any real way. Your grammar is atrocious and for christ’s sake, try “googling” spell-check. That red squiggly line when you’re misspelling something is a clearer message from the spelling gods than what you’ll ever get from your own. I already think less of you for being pushy with your unwanted preaching, and then you clinch it with your piss-poor English skills.
Now, as far as the Boy Scout’s decision…
If you think gay = pedophile you’re a fucking idiot. Sure there are gay pedophiles but there are also hetero, female, hispanic, black, white, young, old and religious pedos too. The uncle who molested me certainly isn’t gay but he was a deacon in his church and a Boy Scout leader! Most gays are not child molesters. They’re just like you except they desire their own sex instead of their opposite. They have loving relationships, marriages where allowed, raise children, pay bills, and respect those that respect them.
Why does that frighten you? Is someone filling your mind with hate? By the way, your love the sinner, hate the sin line is bullshit. We ain’t buying it. If you rant that those queers are trying to ruin everything you’re full of hate. Even if you politely say “they” should not have the same rights you have, you’re a hater. Yes, you are. And you’re teaching your children to hate.
100 years from now gays will have equal rights in everything. People will look back on this time and you haters will be as loved as the KKK. You closed-minded, learning-impaired, hatemongering holier-than-thou hypocrites will be few and far between. It will happen. Educate yourself. Try reading more than one book. And your constant quoting of that stupid book isn’t doing you any good. So STFU and go into your little closed world and talk amongst yourselves. You’re the only ones who want to hear that bullshit. The rest of us want peace and happiness for everyone.
Family status update
Feb 4th
You might remember my niece Brittany and her struggle with Melanoma, Lung Cancer and various other issues. Back in July we thought we’d lose her but she rallied and continued treatment. The doctors ran out of chemo and radiation options and moved on to immune therapy, which she just completed. Over last weekend she was so sick she ended up in the local hospital. She couldn’t move her legs and they found something wrong with a vertebra plus spots on her liver so she was transferred by ambulance to Moffitt Cancer Center in Tampa.
In the meantime my daughter-in-law Krystal was diagnosed with stage 2 cervical cancer and she’s been going to Cancer Treatment Centers of America over in Goodyear since December. She’s not handling this well at all, her digestive tract is stopped up, she’s constantly nauseated and her usual snarky attitude is gone – replaced with alternating whining and crying with a touch of outright bitch. I don’t blame her, honestly. Her mom comes up from El Paso when she can and I accompany her when her mom can’t.
With this all going on it was a difficult decision but I’m leaving on Friday to go to Florida. Krystal has her mom to help her and Brittany is running out of time. I’ve reserved a rental mini-van for my crew – Ginnie, Jack, Casey, Kira and hopefully Max are going with me so my car just isn’t big enough. But we don’t have a lot of money.
IF you have a mini-van and you’d let me borrow it, let me know. IF you want to help us out financially that would be awesome. There’s a paypal button on this site on my podcast producer page.
I just want to hug my niece before it’s too late. I want her to meet Jack and have our family back together one more time. I can’t wait anymore. Time is running out. She’s had a year longer than the doctor’s originally gave her so she’s living on borrowed time.
We’ll be gone until the 17th. I’ve posted about a benefit for Krystal on the 23rd on Facebook. Hopefully the girls who are running this do a lot better than the benefit we held for Brittany last May. Go check that out and see if you can find the time to attend. It’ll be fun!
It’s just shit luck that these two young women that I care so much about have cancer. I wish I could do more but it is what it is. We are all being supportive and doing what we can and sticking together as a family… hoping for the best.
*sigh*
—Edited—
I’ll tell you what, I have awesome friends. Thanks guys! I’ll pay you back as soon as I can. Every little bit of help takes my stress level down that much.
Thank you so much.
Are non organ donors killers?
Feb 4th
This occurred to me today in the ongoing battle for women to have control over their own bodies.
If a woman is carrying another “person” around keeping it alive and decides she’d rather not, she’s a baby-killer, right? At least to some. The fetus needs the women in order to live. The fetus has a right to life!
By that logic those people who refuse or don’t think to donate their organs to keep another person alive are killers, too. Hearts, kidneys, lungs, etc. are necessary to life therefore we should all be mandated to be organ donors. There should be legislation that every American must submit to a registry for organ donation. Mandated once a week blood and/or plasma donations too. Become card-carrying bone marrow donors in waiting.
Am I right? Oh it’s not the same thing? How is it different? Why are the life-sustaining needs of a fetus any different than the life sustaining needs of a fully born person? And why aren’t we all responsible for those who have faulty parts?
Because it infringes on your right to make decisions about your own body. The government can’t make people use their own bodies to save another. People have the choice. How about that.
If you’re pro-life you’d better be an organ donor. In fact you should already be on lists for kidney and blood and bone marrow or whatever else they can get from you now. I hear there are places where they take one person’s shit and put it in another. According to you pro-lifers we must save every life we can!
You’re so invested in what women choose to do with their own bodies when you should be giving more body parts of yourselves to keeping those already born alive. If you have sooo much concern over the needs of the unborn maybe you could use some of that concern down at the local hospital. Do something useful and let other people make their own choices.
Jesus Saved My Child!
Feb 2nd
You know what I think when you say things like that? Nice job shitting on those who are suffering.
Right this minute there’s some crazy old guy holding a 5-year-old hostage in a bunker and the “news” interviewed another parent who said, “My two boys got off the bus at the stop just before this happened. Jesus SAVED my boys!”
Let’s think about this logically. Your kids get off the bus EVERY DAY at the same spot. Do you think Jesus guided the madman to wait until after your stop? Or did Jesus just decide that one poor kid would be the victim that day. I can picture it now, Jesus all up there in the sky saying “Eenie meenie minie moe, that‘s the kid that’s gonna go.” What makes your kid special? Or the taken child not worthy of saving? It seems to me when people say Jesus/God/Allah saves their special person it’s a slap in the face to those families of the victims. You might as well walk up and slap that boy’s mother in the face.
eenie meenie minie moe – photo by woodleywonderworks
We hear this every time something horrible happens. Some parents at Sandy Hook praised the lord that their child wasn’t in that classroom. As if their deity sat up there and aimed the killer on purpose to a different room. Or that infamous story of that one guy deciding last-minute and for no apparent reason not to board a plane that later crashes. God saved him! But what about the hundreds of other people on that plane? What did those 20 little kids in Connecticut ever do to piss off God enough that he’d send a killer to mow them down?
Because that’s what you’re saying when you say your person is so special they were protected while others died. You’re saying the dead people must have deserved it.
IF your deity can save this child or that passenger over another, why can’t he save them all? Get into the mind of the killer and change it? IF your deity is powerful enough, why do those people have to die at all?
Oh right, there’s the other side “Jesus wanted Billy or Sally up in heaven with him.” Another slap in the face.
This is a big reason why people like me have such disgust for people like you. You throw your piety out there with no respect for the feelings of others. I would never say my kid is more deserving of life than your kid. I may not most like other people’s children but I would never wish anything bad happen to them.
Here’s the thing: IF your deity is so great as to chose which person lives and which person dies why not save them all. And IF your deity wants company up in heaven, why not have everyone die peacefully. Why should a 5-year-old need to be shot at all? Or live through painful cancer before finally dying? Or be molested by supposedly pious people?
It’s because there is no deity. There’s nobody out there picking and choosing. Shit happens. Some humans are wonderful and caring (like that bus driver shot and killed yesterday while trying to protect the children) and others are twisted and horrible like the men who shot up an elementary school or kidnapped a small boy.
We’re on our own here on this big beautiful planet and we need to take better care of each other. Instead of praising some invisible shield, be thankful by showing respect to the families of the victims.
And while we’re on the subject, stop praising your deity whenever your team wins a game or you get a great parking spot or an A on your test. If he can’t save a 5-year-old from getting kidnapped or killed he certainly has nothing to do with your good luck or hard work or the talents of sports players or doctors. Give credit where it’s due, to the humans that get things done while you’re over there ineffectually praying to your imaginary friend.
Not ALL Arizonans are Repugnicans
Jan 26th
I really like Arizona. I’ve lived here for over 20 years (for health reasons) and though I’d sometimes rather live somewhere else – somewhere green and hilly with lots of season-changing trees – I’m stuck here. The desert has it’s own beauty and OMD the mountains are awesome. Oh, the Grand Canyon is beyond grand. I’ve met some really great people, too. Arizona is an interesting place to live.
But I don’t love Arizona. Why? The embarrassing Joe Arpaio comes immediately to mind. The strongly Republican government here is next in line. It seems every time Arizona is in the national news, I’m disgusted that I’m automatically associated by just living here.
The latest fiasco is HB2467 wherein graduating students should be required to swear this oath before they can graduate:
I do solemnly swear that I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic; that I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same; that I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose or evasion; and that I will well and faithfully discharge these duties; so help me God.
First of all, you can’t swear freely when they’re holding your diploma hostage. That’s extortion. Secondly, the “so help me God” is unconstitutional. Duh.
Hopefully this will never pass, as many stupid AZ bills have not passed. But just the fact that this and other repugnant bills have ever been submitted in the first place makes me embarrassed to live here.
Here’s the thing though, I know hundreds of people here and to my knowledge most of them are NOT Republicans. Not even a little. We’re here. And though we tend to agree with the disgust at Arizona everyone else has we’ve made a home here.
So please remember the few, the proud but completely outnumbered non-Repugnicans who live in Arizona when you paint the whole state with your contempt. We’re not ALL idiots.
Wait, what? That’s on Toddler Tunes?
Jan 18th
Because grandson Jack loves to dance I usually put Toddler Tunes on the TV when he’s here. Of course he seldom pays any attention unless a section of music comes on that suits his fancy. Having had children around for years I recognize many of the tunes and sometimes sing along. He laughs and laughs. (Geeze laughs is a weird looking word. Is that right?)
When he was over the other day “I’m My Own Grandpa” came on and Ginnie, listening to the lyrics which she’d apparently never heard before, had this confused look on her face.
Now, many many years ago
When I was twenty three
I was married to a widow
Who was pretty as could beThis widow had a grown-up daughter
Had hair of red
My father fell in love with her
And soon the two were wedThis made my dad my son-in-law
And changed my very life
My daughter was my mother
‘Cause she was my father’s wifeTo complicate the matters
Even though it brought me joy
I soon became the father
Of a bouncing baby boyMy little baby then became
A brother-in-law to dad
And so became my uncle
Though it made me very sadFor if he was my uncle
That also made him the brother
Of the widow’s grown-up daughter
Who, of course, was my step-motherI’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpaMy father’s wife then had a son
[. From: http://www.elyrics.net .]
That kept them on the run
And he became my grandchild
For he was my daughter’s sonMy wife is now my mother’s mother
And it makes me blue
Because, she is my wife
She’s my grandmother tooI’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpaNow, if my wife is my grandmother
Then, I am her grandchild
And every time I think of it
It nearly drives me wildFor now I have become
The strangest case you ever saw
As the husband of my grandmother
I am my own grandpaI’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpaI’m my own grandpa
I’m my own grandpa
It sounds funny I know
But it really is so
I’m my own grandpa
Really? Is that appropriate for small children? I realize family nowadays is all kinds of people, but this song always made me think it was being snarky. Kind of making fun of hillbillies in a derogatory way. Definitely not PC.
Also? It makes me want to go to one of those online family tree websites and plot it out. Oh wait, people already have.
Now I’m even more confused.
The Second Amendment
Jan 16th
A lot of people throw The Second Amendment around regarding their “right” to keep whatever kind of gun they want. Let’s break it down, shall we?
A well regulated Militia, being necessary to the security of a free State, the right of the people to keep and bear Arms, shall not be infringed.
That was December 15, 1791, back in the days of ball and powder weapons. Do you think the writers of the Constitution had any idea there would be something as commonly and easily available as a Bushmaster?
“A well regulated Militia” appears to have been translated into “any stupid motherfucker” nowadays. I’m pretty sure even the open-minded leaders of our country wouldn’t have wanted the village idiot to have access to a high-speed easily re-loadable weapon of death. Let’s get serious. What exactly are these things used for? Target shooting? Fine. Bragging rights? Swell. Certainly not for hunting. What would you have left after shooting a poor animal with one of these? Home security? Really? 
Okay. Let’s say there’s a legitimate use for the average American to have a “rifle” like one of the Bushmasters. Why is it so unpalatable to have these kinds of weapons regulated? What’s wrong with each one being registered to a specific owner? An owner that has been vetted to have a basic level of, oh I dunno, mental capacity? That each person who wants one of these (or several /rolleyes) has to pass a test to show a certain level of training and use, to show a level of ability and safety awareness? These are not toys and not every person should have one. You should not be able to walk into any Bass Pro Shop or trade show and walk out with one. Seriously. Not without proving you’re capable of the responsibility.
As far as those morons practically screaming that President Obama (or whatever you chose in your pathetic stupidity to call him) is going to take away all your guns: Grow the fuck up. Nobody is taking away your guns. It’s not possible or even likely. But the same way not every American is entitled to drive a tank, not every American is entitled to have a semi-automatic weapon around. Some things are just not meant for everyone.
But gun people just won’t give an inch.
Sure, we need to work on better mental health care. That’s HUGE but it needs to be done. It’s the mentally unbalanced that take those guns and shoot up movie theaters, schools and shopping malls. But we also need to stop making those types of guns available to those who aren’t responsible enough to have them. Just like you wouldn’t hand one over to a 4-year-old, you shouldn’t hand one over to someone who is mentally unbalanced, has anger issues or is just plain irresponsible.
Let’s start with registration, then at least we’d have a record of who has what. Then bounce that list against a police database of known problem people. Let’s loosen up on mental health professionals. If they think someone is dangerous, let’s put them on the DO NOT ALLOW list of gun sales. Tough shit if someone misses out because their counselor is mistaken. Stop being so fucking PC. The rights of the one are not more important than the rights of the many… to be safer.
And while I’m at it, stop with the bullshit arguments. Knives and guns are not equal in any argument. Guns and hammers are not equal. Guns and cars, guns and rat poison… wait, even RAT POISON is better regulated than guns. What does that say about us?
Just being in this country doesn’t entitle you to a gun. You should have to prove you’re ready for one. If you don’t want them all taken away, you need to prove you can be responsible with one. I still don’t understand why anyone would want any gun around, but if you do what’s wrong with proving you deserve the privilege? I’ve thought about getting a handgun, but I wouldn’t want one without learning as much as possible about the use and care and safety issues involved. I wouldn’t go in half-cocked as some people are wont. Those things are dangerous. Think about all the people you know. Now how many of them should never be allowed near any gun no matter if it’s their “right” or not? Yeah, I thought so.
Well regulated. Our country’s founders were fucking brilliant. It’s the idiots that have come after that FAIL.
You have to register to own a business. You have to register to drive a car. You have to register to hunt and fish. Why not have to register to own a gun? Basic common sense.
Dear Mushmouth-at-the-door,
Jan 9th
Thank you so much for knocking on my door and interrupting my work. Appreciate it, really.
You know what I’d really appreciate though? If you’re going to go door-to-door to teach people about the Mother of God – which incidentally was about all I could understand of your spiel – you might want to take a couple of things into consideration. First of all enunciation is quite important when conversing with strangers. As far as I could tell you were starting up on what sounded like Mother of God and although I can’t recall anyone ever saying that particular phrase n their sales pitch you could have been talking about anything at all. Who knows. Your enunciation is atrocious. Maybe you’re tired after spending time bother people in their own homes or maybe you normally talk like you have a mouthful of shit.
(Which by the way, if you’re talking about the Mother of God you do have a mouthful of shit.)
Anywaaaaaaay, the second thing I’d like to say is… when you approach a door with this sign predominately displayed you probably should take a pass on it. Seriously.
I could have gave you all kinds of grief about your “message” and torn apart any religious bullshit you were planning on spewing. But I’m not really dressed for pious young men at my door plus I’m kind of busy planting moon melons on FarmVille working on podcasts. So I just looked you in the eye while sliding my middle finger up the door and tapping on my handy-dandy supposed-to-keep-people-like-you-away sign. Right there. Obvious. It IS the only thing on my door. Take a hint.
Please take my door slamming personally.
Gee thanks,
Me
PS I try really hard not to be racist but when two sloppily dressed young black men knock on my door at night I get a little nervous. Good thing you didn’t see the razor blade I had in my other hand. I apologize for that. I was expecting someone else and opening my door to see you kind of threw me off. My bad.
Stupid Flagtaff Justice Court bullshit
Jan 9th
It is 2013, right?
Why can’t I pull up a government website on the goddamned Internet and do the business I need to do? Simply provide a copy of insurance or pay a fine or whatever? How fucking hard is it?
That first weekend in December when we went to the Grand Canyon was tons of fun, but on the way back – not so much. It’s not really a big thing but it’s been a real pain in the ass to sort it out. On 12/02 we (as we always do) came out the east side of the park and headed back to Flagstaff. Not too far after getting on US89 Max got pulled over for something like not pulling out of a gas station safely. Whatever. It all boiled down to the fact that I didn’t have a current proof of insurance printed out for the car. And of course there was absolutely NO cell coverage to pull up the current information on the handy-dandy insurance program up on my phone. I had insurance, just an old proof. So the officer write the citation, tells me to wait a few days for the paperwork to hit the courts and I can fax (FAX?) in the proof. Easy peasy.
Except I waited a couple of days (12/04) to contact the court. Following the directions on the citation I looked up the website. First azdps/courts then find the court link which takes you to a map. Then the map has a link to the actual court wherein the link was bad. Awesome. So I called. Somehow I ended up with a human who looked up my citation – or rather tried to as it still wasn’t “in the system.” She suggested I wait another week so I put the citation aside and just remembered it today.
Look, I tried right away. It’s not my goddam fault they don’t have their shit together.
Today I pulled out the citation and noticed the court date was 01/03. Oops. Again, back to the stupid website where I go back through the steps and this time when I call there’s a recording with the name, address, phone number (that I already know because I’m calling, duh) their hours and the usual hit zero for this and one for that. I hit zero – click clack – back to the beginning of the same recording. Three times I go through this hoping to connect to a human. Is today a vacation day?
Oh, the recording says they don’t accept FAX anyway. So fuck you Officer Friendly.
In this day and age, I should be able to FIND an email address or a working phone number to get a human and email them my proof of insurance. Or at the very least, the directions for mailing it to a specific responsible person. I sure don’t want to just mail it to the general address. Who knows how they could screw that up.
Seriously.
I tried calling again and got an actual person. He had trouble FINDING the citation. I was told I could just mail a copy of proof of insurance proving the car was covered that day to the general mailbox at the justice court. Just write the case number on it. Right. That’ll work.
I did mention email, he just laughed.
And then I looked at the proof I have. Guess what? It just happened to renew dated 12/02. Shit. Now it looks like I went home and got new insurance just to cover this citation. I DID NOT. I wonder if I can find a copy of proof dated before then so I don’t look like a fraud?
What a pain in the ass.
