Telling it like I see it
so don't ask if you don't want to know
Inspection?
Jan 11th
Found a note on my door a couple days ago. A two-day notice of intent to enter apparently every apartment in the complex.
This inspection is for our annual lender inspection and is a mandatory inspection of all apartment homes located within our community. Due to the nature of this inspection, we can not accommodate appointments or reschedule.
WTF? Annual lender inspection is a new one on me. So sometime 9-5 today or tomorrow someone will be inspecting my apartment for what? What would the lender be looking for? Illegal activity? Improper remodeling? Poor hygiene? Hoarders???!!!!!
I’m resisting the urge to attempt a massive deep cleaning. My place is a little messy with little girl stuff as I don’t bother to clean up after the kid unless I’m expecting company of my own. There are 2-3 dishes in the sink and a bag of trash by the door to be taken out. I suppose I could vacuum… fuck that.
The worst part is I have to be dressed. I’m seldom wearing real clothes when I’m home alone because I’m an elderly shut-in. I have “house clothes.” Let your imagination wander.
Bring it on lender inspectors.
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OK, so they came and went. Three guys, one to check if I had all the appliances and that they worked, one guy went in to the bathroom (without the light on) and spent a couple minutes doing I dunno what, and the third guy wandered around looking at the edges of the ceiling in every room with a giant flashlight presumably looking for water leaks.
Seriously, what was the guy doing in the bathroom? I didn’t hear any water running or flushing, but what would you inspect in the bathroom in the dark? He didn’t even have a flashlight. Creepy. And now I have to pee and I don’t want to go in there.
Baby Baptismals
Jan 3rd
Well, apparently my grandson was baptized over the weekend. My daughter asked me weeks ago if I was okay with it. Sure, it doesn’t mean anything to me. She’s mentioned it a couple of times since but I thought it was later in the month.
Her boyfriend’s family is very Catholic and she’s been living with them, so it was a given. If it makes them all happy it’s fine by me. I’m sure Jack won’t be any different when I go see him tomorrow.
I had my kids baptized Episcopalian back in the day, even though I never actually joined the church and never went back. Maybe I thought it was a fail-safe at the time.
But even now I still don’t get it. What’s the point again? The child won’t remember, the child may or may not ever decide to follow that or any other religion. Baptized babies aren’t any healthier or happier.
There is that godparent thing. So Tyler’s brother and his wife? girlfriend? I can’t remember are now Jack’s godparents. That means they’re in charge of his spiritual upbringing (whatever that is) and supposedly take custody if anything happens to Tyler and Ginnie right?
Let me tell you now, if anything happens to my daughter and that child needs care that family is in for a big awakening. None of us may have been invited to attend his baptismal or even invited to visit him (only me) but when push comes to shove we’ll be fighting to keep him. It’s her choice now to go along with their religiosity in order to keep the peace where she lives, but so far deep down inside she’s still an atheist just like the rest of my family. We’ll share, but we won’t give up.
And when he gets big enough to question I’ll make damned sure he does. Just like Kira, when she asks me questions I tell her what I think and that other people think differently and she needs to make up her own mind.
Things women don’t talk about
Dec 29th
Sometime around my 40ish birthday and after the birth of my third child I noticed I had an issue with leakage. Every time I would cough or sneeze a little bit of pee would leak out. For years this went on, sometimes worse and sometimes not at all. I never knew until BAM! in the middle of a laughing fit I’d have to go to the bathroom and deal with the problem. I even carried pantyliners just in case. I’m pretty sure that’s why panty liners were invented actually.
You know what? Plenty if not most women that age have that problem but they don’t talk about it. Who wants to admit they can’t hold their pee? It’s embarrassing to admit.
So maybe you whisper it to your doctor and he advises daily kegel exercises which I have always done anyway so that didn’t help. Fortunately when I had my hysterectomy he tightened something in my bladder to I don’t have pesky incontinence issues anymore unless my bladder is full.
But my point is, every woman – at some point in their adult life – has incontinence problems. They just don’t talk about it.
Nature fucks with us in other ways too. I always had bad cramps with my periods. Day off in bed with a heating pad cramps. Some women don’t and bully for them! I tolerated this shit for years complaining to my GYNs (I go to the VA so there’s a different GYN each time) at every visit until finally one sent me for tests and I had fibroids making my uterus 3 times the size it should be. No wonder it hurt so bad every month. If you’re having excessively painful cramps and heavy periods then don’t let your GYN put you off. Insist they find out why and how it can be fixed. Why do women go though extra-painful periods every month? Because we’re told it’s natural, or it’s just the way it is, or you’re just whiny for bitching about it. Bullshit. If you’re not using your uterus all kinds of crap could be going on in there. Stand up for yourself.
Women are caretakers with everyone else but they tend to keep quiet about their own issues. We teach our kids to buck up and not be whiners so when WE have a problem we put on a strong front and keep silent. Again, bullshit. If something feels wrong, talk about it. Tell your doctor. Discuss it with your women friends. They likely won’t want to talk about it either but we should. Why should we be embarrassed about our bodies and what may or may not be going wrong with them? How are you supposed to know what is natural and what isn’t if you don’t discuss?
If your poo isn’t coming out as it should, talk to someone. If your periods are wacky, talk to someone about it. If you wet your pants on a regular basis talk to your doctor. Don’t suffer in silence.
Let’s talk about grooming
Dec 29th
It’s natural for women to have hair in places we nowadays want it removed. In polite society we shave our armpits to reduce body odor first and foremost but there’s an aesthetic reason too. Since the advent of hosiery we’ve removed our leg hair too. Nothing more uncomfortable than wearing pantyhose when you haven’t shaved your legs. And once we started wearing bikinis it was kind of yucky to have little curlies peeking out the edges so we’d go for the bikini cut.
Then it became ridiculous. Women are removing hair everywhere. Women are told too much ARM hair is unattractive and it must be removed! Some women have hair on their toes and knuckles or a uni-brow they’d like to never worry about again. And for some reason it’s become unusual to have a pubic bush. Though I’ve never waxed, shaving that area only feels good for like a day. After that regrowth is very uncomfortable! Itchy and pokey. I understand waxing makes that bare feeling last a bit longer but not by much. So why do we do it?
If you think about it, a bare pubic area is natural on children but once you’ve hit puberty it’s supposed to be covered in hair. I dunno why, but that’s how it is. Are grown-ass women trying to look like little girls? Isn’t that a bit… creepy? Sure it feels good for a minute but then there’s the inevitable constant removal cycle costing fairly big bucks to maintain.
Speaking of big bucks, I find it interesting that in our advanced science age someone hasn’t come up with a semi-permanent painless and reasonably inexpensive way to remove unwanted hair. I still think there’s a conspiracy in the hair removal industry. How hard can it be to create a cream that kills hair follicles without damaging anything else? I believe people have and are getting paid off.
- I never want hair on my chin.
- I never want hair in my armpits.
- I never want hair on my legs.
- I never want hair on my bikini lines, but I’m not sure about the rest of the crotchal area.
Home waxing kits run from $5 to $20 but some places on your body are pretty hard to get to on your own. One place I looked up lists these prices:
| Eyebrow with shaping | $10 |
| Upper lip or chin | $7 |
| Facial Wax | $35 |
| Full Leg | $50 |
| Half Leg | $30 |
| Full Arm | $30 |
| Half Arm | $20 |
| Under Arm | $15 |
| Chest | $35 & Up |
| Tummy | $40 |
| Bikini | $30 |
| Playboy | $35 |
That’s pretty expensive to me. Certainly out of my range. How often do you have to get this stuff done? Even if you’re a shaver, the cost of new razors is high considering it’s basically a chunk of plastic holding a teeny razor blade.
So why do you do it? Comfort? To please your partner? Because society has decreed you must?
But I don’t KNOW yet!
Dec 27th
This happens a lot. Someone posts a link on twitter or facebook or what-have-you and click you go. As the page loads you get a glimpse of what the link is about when WHAM! Up pops a HOW DO YOU LIKE OUR SITE? survey window.
WTF?
I don’t know yet!
Somewhere the guy in charge of the surveys is wondering why nobody responds. Maybe it’s because I’ve never been to your site and I haven’t had a chance to check it out. This usually happens on newspaper websites but not always. It happens more often than not on the My HealtheVet where I have been often and have already responded to their survey.
Isn’t there some way to, oh I dunno, differentiate new or anonymous one-time hits from those who regularly visit a site? Yes I know there is. Wouldn’t your stupid survey get actual usable data from consistent readers? You’d think so.
But no, some idiot makes sure the first thing you see when you visit their site is a survey request that you can’t possibly answer honestly.
Way to go.
Happy Holidays
Dec 25th
My cousin’s wife sent me this email:
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! May Christ’s birth bless you with love and forgiveness in 2012.
(What’s with the love of exclamation points?)
First of all, I prefer Happy Holidays as it’s more inclusive of everyone who celebrates this season. I’m not sure I know any Jewish people or anyone who does Kwanzaa but everyone celebrates something, right? Even our Atheist family we have Christmas trees and gifts, traditional Eve pizza and then drive around looking at lights.
Last night we gathered at Max’s and had our family Christmas. Everyone was happy with my well-thought-out gifts and I was happy with the earrings and fireplace tools I received. And especially the Zynga game card! We even had my Dad on Skype while we opened presents so it was like he was actually there.
Secondly, why do I need forgiveness? One thing I dislike about religion is the assumption that everyone is bad unless they ask forgiveness from some god constantly. What a way to go through life. I’ve read the book and nobody can live up to the standards set there, even if one religion or another could actually finalize them. I feel people are basically good, but some make more bad decisions than others. If I’ve done something I need forgiveness for be sure to let me know.
So… I hope you’ve had a happy holiday whatever it is, and here’s hoping 2012 actually finishes even better than this year.
Slippery Slope?
Dec 21st
Things we could do say, 5 years ago that we can’t do now or will not be able to do in the near future:
We have no right to a fair trial anymore. Anyone in the US can be arrested and held indefinitely without trial. Don’t think you’re safe, anything can be considered a terrorist attack. The OWS protesters could be considered terrorists if the government wants to stretch the truth.
You can’t put anything you want up on the Internet anymore. All it takes is one complaint and your website can be seized, again without notice or trial and for an indefinite amount of time.
Roe v Wade is nearly gone. “Personhood” laws are coming up in many states. Fetus rights are considered more important than the rights of the female incubator! And when that doesn’t work the anti-choicers work to legislate the businesses that provide abortions. Crap like regulating the size of the bathrooms and hallways has already closed don centers. State governments are trying to shut down Planned Parenthood funding because of a small percentage of their business. You’re screwed if you’re a poor woman and need a mammogram or STD test.
The gay’s battle for equality seems be looking up with the repeal of DADT and with this story, but every Republican running for President can’t wait to put them back in their closet.
Oh yes, the Republican candidates seems to be obsessed with the gays, against science education and just plain full of outdated thinking. Let’s go back a few years so they can pat themselves on the back with their righteousness. But not one seems to have a clear understanding of world politics or how to fix our economy. They want a Leave it to Beaver America and damn those with forward thinking.
And just so you know, you can’t protest anymore. I’ve watched a few live uStreams as the OWS protesters were rounded up. Using the excuse that these people were either camping illegally or loitering, they were brutalized by the police and thrown in jail. Funny how people camping or loitering outside Apple stores or for black Friday deals weren’t breaking the law. But raise your hand and say our Government is out of control and you’re the enemy.
There is no slippery slope. Our rights are being chopped off so fast its like watching California landslides where the houses just go… plop.
Welcome to America.
Holiday Newsletter
Dec 20th
Short and sweet, I promise.
Casey and Kira are doing great. He’s got a really good job and Kira is in kindergarten. She turned 5 in September and never stops talking. The hair? Well, he thought by showing up with his hair like that he’d get out of family picture day. No such luck. I get to have Kira overnight a couple times a week and she’s just now starting to get interesting as a person. We do have some good times.
Max and Krystal are doing well also. They have 2 cats and no plans for children. Max is going to school and working part-time for now. In another year he’ll be done with school, working full time and planning on buying a house. Krystal works too and is hoping to go to cooking school when Max graduates.
Ginnie and her boyfriend Tyler had a baby this year. His name is Jack and he’s wonderful. They are for the time being living with Tyler’s mom so there’s always someone around to take care of Jack but have plans for their future.
I’m still the same. I volunteer for various events and go out every week with friends but I still am alone or spending way too much time with my kids. With the economy the way it is, they can’t do well without help. We’ve ended up very close so I guess I’m not as alone as I thought.
I’m Christian, unless you’re gay.
Dec 16th
I never do this but I want you to go to Single Dad Laughing and read this blog post.
Go ahead. It’s a long post but it is the most moving thing I’ve ever read. This is what I as an Atheist think religious people should be doing. We ALL should be doing.
And if you have more time, his follow-up post is fantastic, too.
Go.
War? Hot nardly.
Dec 15th
We laugh over the claim every year that non-believers are waging war on Christmas. So here is my collection of recent battles:
Let’s start with Fox’s. Fox is the biggest PITA complainer and yet when they put up their ornaments this year, they were listed as “Holiday” ornaments. Apparently someone got the heads up on it and the page was changed to Christmas ornaments – though I can’t verify because as of this minute you can’t even get to any Fox ornament page. 404 my ass.
(Haha, I get a “potentially dangerous” warning from McAfee when I open Fox News website)
Another uber-religious blowhard, Rick Perry and his family wish you Happy Holidays.
Sure there are minor battles going on all over the country regarding government-sanctioned nativity scenes like this one in Santa Monica and another in Athens, Texas. Some city governments get it and let every religion (or non-religion) put up a holiday symbol but others assume when Atheists ask for equal treatment they’re really at war against Christians. Actually we just want fair and equal treatment for everyone, all or nothing.
The Atheists I know don’t complain about Christmas trees, official or otherwise. In fact, the rumor about the White House renaming their trees Holiday Trees is false. I don’t put up a tree anymore but it’s not for any non-religious reason. I love Christmas Trees, I just don’t have the room or the energy. In fact, Christmas Trees aren’t religious anyhow:
I love decorated houses. When I had a house I went overboard with the lights. I still have a 6ft winter penguin and a cute little inflatable reindeer. I love gift-giving and fellowship, some of the music and most of the other traditions for this time of year. I’ve even visited various nativity scenes (and a live one in Florida) with the kids over the years. The nativity is one of the nicer parts of the jesus myth. Who wouldn’t want to believe in a miraculous child? One of my favorite songs is Mary Did You Know? But to me it’s about as believable as Star Wars legends.
There is no war. People, especially Christians, must be reminded the season is NOT all about them, that’s all.
