so don't ask if you don't want to know
People are stupid
I just can’t help pointing these people out.
You started it!
Apr 19th
Right there in my reader this morning was Friendly Atheist’s post where he quotes from this video:
They’re bullies. And we know that we people stand up to the bully on the playground — the bully on the playground intimidates, that’s what he does, intimidates people into silence, into fear, into avoiding the bully. And oftentimes the bully is the paper tiger and when the righteous individual who is being bullied defends his or herself and punches the bully in the mouth, guess what, the bully more times than not has a glass jaw, falls down and then everyone on the playground says “whoa, the bully was a weakling after all.”
That’s the secularist left. The secularist left are bullies. They try to bully and intimidate and push religious intolerance and religious bigotry on everyone else.
WHAT. THE. FUCK! Religious people are the bullies in your little scenario.
If you want to compare the ongoing battle between the religious and the secularists, you might want to remember the bully then goes whining to the teacher. You’re whining. Because you can’t bully anymore, your previous victims are fighting back and not starting the fights. You whine because the downtrodden have rebelled. Look in a fucking mirror!
Secularists, atheists and even people who just believe different gods than you have been bullied for centuries. Right now in small towns and communities all over this country people are afraid to admit they don’t believe. They’re bullied in the most despicable ways. Read the stories in r/atheism where people are thrown out of their homes and disowned by their loving parents, they lose jobs, are forced to listen to the preaching and are constantly told “YOU’RE GOING TO BURN IN HELL FOREVER!” Which, actually, doesn’t mean anything to us other than your hate is so strong you would wish this upon another human being. Christian love, my ass.
We’re just punching your bully in the face to protect ourselves. We’re just plain tired of your shit. You have completely over-stepped your boundaries and we’re fighting back. You started it, just like your proverbial bully.
There is no war on religion. You can believe what you want in your churches and homes with people who choose to believe as you. Secularists just want you to keep your beliefs out of everyone else’s life. We’re fighting to stop religious-based legislation. We’re pointing out the fallacies in your “this is a Christian nation” lies. We want our free America back. Stay where you belong and out of our wombs, our bedrooms and our schools and we’d get along just fine.
In my family we have a saying, “Don’t poke the bull.” Eventually the bull gets tired of it and turns on you. Well the bull has turned and you deserve it, so quitcherwhinin.
Why does everyone hate women?
Apr 16th
My friend Mur published this letter to her daughter.
People need to stop and think.
Men need to stop comparing what they think is weak behavior to being womanly. Stop having the mindset that it’s okay to sneer at another man and call him girly names like sissy, pussy, little girl, etc. Girls throw like girls, men who can’t throw just can’t throw. Period. Men who cry are just releasing tension, not acting like a woman. It’s not funny and far more damaging when you use comparisons to females in a disparaging way. You’re just perpetuating the women are lesser humans than men bullshit. Children watch and learn from adults around them and pick up the language and sentiment. If your juvenile need to razz your male friends at any given moment is part of your limited personality then use other words.
Women need to stop treating each other like shit, too.
Why is it okay to call any woman other than your mother, sister or daughter a whore? Men have been allowed and often encouraged to fuck any female they can, but the women they do it with are sluts? What the fuck is that? Women are supposed to “keep their legs closed” outside of marriage but men can cat around whenever they want. If a woman cheats on her husband people’s first thought is she’s a whore, but a man cheats on his wife and people’s first thought is there’s something wrong with the wife and the other woman is a whore. The man holds no responsibility?
Why is there still such a double-standard?
We are all adults. We should be able to make our sexual decision equally. If a woman wants to enjoy a variety of sexual partners that’s her decision, just like a man’s prerogative is his. And what business is it of yours what other people are doing in their beds?
And all this disparaging makes it okay to pay women less for doing the same job as a man?
I have male friends who don’t think of women as lesser beings. They talk to women in business as whole people rather than not a man. It can be done.
It starts with teaching our children stupid terms like girl toys and boy toys. Or games or interests or abilities. We start this early and perpetuate it their whole lives. Why? Why are young girls discouraged from science and math? Why are young boys discouraged from cooking and babysitting? Why is it okay to harass young girls who enjoy sports by calling them tomboys? Why can’t it be girly to be really athletic? Why can’t it be manly to be nurturing?
Most people automatically do this everyday in one way or another and it has to stop. When you hear yourself or someone say something comparing the “victim’s” action as not appropriate to their sex as defined 50 years ago, STOP IT. Train yourself and others around you to stop defining stereotypical roles. Give a little girl a tonka truck or a science kit if she’s interested. Give a little boy a doll or dance classes if that’s what he wants. Stop encouraging your daughter to wear pink if she hates it. Let your son wear it if he wants to. Stop calling women whores and sluts just because they like sex.
Stop treating women like lesser beings, after all you wouldn’t be here if a woman wasn’t willing to have sex, birth you and raise you up. What? Your mom isn’t like other women? Bet me.
Dear Arizona Legislature,
Apr 13th
Are you high?
Do you have any idea what you’ve done? Yesterday was a banner day!
By a vote 17-13, the Senate passed HB 2625. HB 2625 would allow any employer citing a religious objection to refuse to include birth control in insurance coverage for workers. Sure, women who want their birth control covered by the insurance they pay for can find another job but how possible is that in this economy?
The Senate passed 1359 21-9, which means doctors can’t be held liable if they lie or leave out information to their patients. Doctors not being honest with their patients about their health is a good thing, right? As if some people don’t already have trust issues with their doctors.
Governor Brewer signed 2036, making changes to current abortion laws, including banning abortions after 20 weeks except in a “medical emergency,” allowing doctors to prescribe medication abortion pills only through the seventh week of pregnancy which starts counting the first day of your last period. Adding on to this, clinics must post signs saying it is against the law to coerce a woman into having an abortion, physicians must provide additional information about health risks, and the state must create a website with abortion health risks, contact information for adoption agencies and photos or drawings of developing fetuses.
Seriously? That leaves a woman about a 2-minute window to make her choice. How do these things usually work? A girl misses her period (4 weeks) and maybe waits another week just in case she’s just late. Takes a OTC test and it says yes, she starts pondering – maybe talks to the boy – makes a doctor’s appointment (which may take a couple of weeks to get) and makes sure. We’re up to 6-7 weeks already, IF she’s keeping track, too late for the “abortion” pill, so she has to make the appointment for the more invasive type. That’s performed one day a week at the local clinic and she just missed it or they’re booked for a while, plus she’s broke and needs to gather funds. Cutting it a little close, aren’t you?
So where are the “information about health risks, contact information and photos” going to come from? Let me guess. The often-disputed anti-choice websites? It’s a proven fact there are more health risks from having an actual baby than those from an abortion. And exactly how many women are being coerced INTO having an abortion? More likely they’re being berated and shamed OUT of having one only to be left with this innocent child they didn’t want.
Here’s the thing. THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE ON THE PLANET AS IT IS. Women should be applauded for controlling their fertility, not condemned. Do we really, truly want every woman to have no other choice but to plop out child after child that they likely cannot afford to raise humanely? These unwanted children will likely be raised in poverty relying on government programs. How many kids are in the system now? How many kids are raised by parents just fit enough to not have them taken away?
The same people who legislate fertility are the same ones who repeatedly cut welfare programs. Does that make sense?
Is the underlying purpose of these laws to make it impossible for people to have sex at all? After all, you can’t trust your doctor to provide information about avoiding pregnancy, your insurance coverage (if you’re lucky enough to have a job with such coverage) might not cover birth control and you can’t get it discounted when all the Planned Parenthood clinics are shut down. Then when you do accidentally get pregnant you can’t stop it AND you’re stuck with a child you don’t want and a society who looks down on you and refuses to help. Sound like a great place to you?
Hey, we’re all doing our best out here to have lives and live them with some sort of comfort and dignity. And occasionally have sex. Stop making it harder.
Love (not),
Debbie Walker
Dear Tennessee,
Apr 12th
If you want to know why other people on this planet tend to stereotype your residents as backwards, stupid or idiots, look at what we see coming out of what are supposed to be your best of show: your elected officials:
1. Updated Abstinence Bill. In a new family life instructions bill, holding hands and kissing could be considered gateways to sex. The bill prohibits teachers from demonstrating gateway sexual activity including health education models.
WHAT WE KNOW: There is no evidence to date that abstinence-only-until-marriage education delays teen sexual activity. Moreover, research shows that abstinence-only strategies may deter contraceptive use among sexually active teens, increasing their risk of unintended pregnancy and STIs.
You can’t fight hormones. You just can’t. It’s better to teach our youth how to protect themselves IF the
y get in a sexual situation than to send them out every day blind. Duh. Hugging is a gateway to sex? Really?
2. The “Monkey” Bill. To prevent school administrators from reining in teachers who expound on “alternative hypotheses” to the scientific theories of evolution and climate change.
WHAT WE KNOW: Science is a systematic enterprise that builds and organizes knowledge in the form of testable explanations and predictions about the universe.
Creationism or “intelligent design” is not science. Because the bible says so is not testable proof. Our planet is billions of years old, plants and animals (including humans) have evolved and though climate change is inevitable in nature, man has/is having an effect on our current climate.
3. The Life Defense Act of 2012. Directs the state Health Department to post on its website a report on every abortion, to be filled out by the facility where the procedure takes place. The reports must includ
e the “identification of the physician who performed the abortion and the physician’s office, clinic, hospital or other facility where the abortion was performed,” according to the official summary of the bill. Although the bill states that patients will not be identified in the reports, it says the documents must include the woman’s county, age, race, marital status, plus her number of prior pregnancies, number of prior abortions, the gestational age of the fetus, and her preexisting medical conditions.
WHAT WE KNOW: Abortions are legal in the United States of America.
What really gives you the right to collect and publish information on a legal medical procedure? Maybe the next bill should be about erectile dysfunction procedures. You don’t need a hard-on anymore once your quota of kids is planted, do you?
Anyway, this is an example of why people across the world think of you – and by association the rest of the US – as backwards. Please stop. You’re making us look bad. Put down the bible and research some real science.
————
Now I’m not saying we here in Arizona are any better as we have our own elected idiots in office. I’m just picking on Tennessee today. Tomorrow I may point out other states with backwards thinking… like mine.
Stereotypes
Apr 4th
Today’s FUCKed up parenting story:
Girl forced to run 3 hours dies
The gist of the story is a 9-year-old was forced to run for three hours as punishment for having lied to her grandmother about eating candy bars. In the heat, in Alabama.
There are many conclusions you can draw from the little article based on these key words:
- double-wide trailer
- dirt road
- bi-polar and alcoholic
- Alabama
Where does your mind go? What assumptions do you make based on stereotypes?
Then there are the comments. *sigh*
I’ll tell you what, it appears to me grammar ability can be correlated to religiosity. I graduated High School but never went to college and I can put together fairly decent sentences. Sure I don’t have perfect grammar but I’m well above the average Internet commenter, especially the religious ones. Just read through those comments! Or comments on any story with god people and you see they are often barely comprehensible. And I’m stereotyping based on my own observations.
So you have the guy who states the obvious statistical probability.
Trailers, booze, and let me guess, probably a lot more religion than brains.
Followed by over a hundred comments on just that line alone. He’s offensive/he’s likely right. From god saved the child, then god didn’t save the child from the pain but she’s in a better place now, to there is no god. There’s the usual MY religion wouldn’t hurt a child that way so they can’t be real christians followed by those who snarkily point out the bible says it’s fine to kill your own child for misbehavior.
Way more stereotypes based on a small article that actually doesn’t say anywhere the religious preferences of the FUCKed up parent. More assumptions.
We all make assumptions based on what information we get and often we end up being right. But there are times when people get railroaded on the Internet based on that same small amount of information. There are still questions about what happened to Trayvon Martin. All over the web both sides are posting semi-related “information” about the boy, about Zimmerman and even about the police there. Where is the truth? Speculation and out-right lies. I mean somebody has to be lying.
What if Trayvon wasn’t the stereotypical young black man in a hoodie? What if he was a good boy doing no wrong? What if the young girl above was a brat and lied all the time and this 3-hour run was an extreme punishment after several attempts at other corrections? Or was she a constantly abused innocent with a masochistic grandmother.
The point is, we don’t know the whole story. The Internet has become a shouting match for people’s opinions based on stereotypes and personal history.
Take a second next time you type up your outraged comment. Do you really know the whole story or are you just blurting out based on your own stereotypes?
Censorship
Feb 27th
BAM this morning in my feed there are two separate articles on censorship, though for different reasons.
First there’s Evo’s link to ZDnet‘s Paypal article:
On Saturday February 18, PayPal began threatening indie book publishers and distributors with immediate deactivation of the businesses’ accounts if they did not remove books containing certain sexual themes – namely, specific sexual fantasies that PayPal does not approve of.
And then Friendly Atheist has a post about YouTube pulling “religiously offensive” videos with little notice.
First of all, private businesses can set guidelines and do what they want when you break those guidelines. I get that. BUT…
When you are the place, the #1 go-to for eCommerce or shared creativity then you have a certain responsibility to be transparent and fair.
Make the rules clear. None of this we-might-not-like-what-you’re-doing-today bullshit. If you want to say “we won’t support bestiality stories” then say that.
Know the difference. There’s is a HUGE difference between religious criticism and hate speech or between illegal sexual acts and fantasy ones. I find many religious videos on YouTube offensive but unless and until they’re hateful I don’t act offended. When something is obviously wrong (like when reddit killed the r/jailbait subreddit) it’s pretty clear, but fantasy stories about having sex with a guy who happens to turn into a wolf are hardly bestiality. Any content with consenting adults involved should be allowed.
Allow mediation. If content is reported as offensive then have some sort of compromise position between ignoring it and deleting it. Get independent opinions. If 600 people like something and 3 people complain, consider the source.
Either stand behind independence or cave to the offended and make it clear to everyone else what side you want to be on.
YouTube, eBay, Facebook, flickr, Amazon, PayPal… we all love these #1 companies because they’re like the WalMarts of the Internet. They’re the big boxes we default to because that’s where people are looking for content. Sure there are alternatives – but who knows them? And with power comes corruption, I know that. But the Internet needs to keep its independence and those providers need to take that responsibility to heart.
And people? People need to stop thinking of their own personal feelings and really consider before clicking that “report” button. Is it hate speech or do you just not like it? Is someone really hurting another person or are you just too uptight. Do you really need to report something as offensive or can you just never go back to that content again? If you feel NOBODY should EVER have to innocently come across that story or video feel free to report it, but if it just makes you feel squidgy then move along.
When you don’t know
Feb 24th
I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know everything, that I’m lazy and that when it comes to research I generally stop after the first 3 pages on Google.
So how do I form my opinions? I surround myself with people who are smarter than I and who are passionate about being informed – and I listen to them.
Usually.
I have a friend Dani who feeds me links to political stuff, I visit the Skepchick blog for skeptic and science and women’s issues. I have a feed from Jezebel that – although it’s mostly celebrity fluff – sometimes has very good editorials on women’s issues, politics and bluntly calls people out. I check out r/atheism though most of it is just mean but occasionally someone posts something funny or important. And I adore the Friendly Atheist.
I have real life friends whose opinions matter. My friends are generally atheist or science-minded, are for equality for all races and sexual orientations, and are just plain intelligent. They can put together complete sentences, are entrepreneurs and are always trying to better themselves and their communities.
What I have learned in the last few years? Here are a few keywords:
Citations. You don’t pass along information unless you trust the author and even then you make a cursory search to verify. I don’t believe something unless I can find it from a trusted source – which is a big step for my gullible self. So many of my previous opinions have been changed by considering the sources.
Collaboration. People are more successful if they work together. Which is why I love Gangplank, Podcamp/TechPhx, WordCamp, and Ignite. All of them are regular people working together (usually for free) to offer their experience and knowledge to those around them. I volunteer so much of my time to these organizations because I’ve learned so much and want to share.
Credit. The people around me are sure to give credit to those who help them. They refer, they review, and they make sure everyone is thanked. I need to work harder on thanking people.
Positivity. *sigh* I’m naturally a negative person so this is harder for me. If you can’t say anything nice and all that. I’ve had so much positive reinforcement from my friends that I’ve GOT to get better at passing that along.
Change. As I said above my opinions have changed on many subjects. You have to be open to change. If intelligent learned people think your opinion is whacky, then chances are you need to do more research and find out if you’re right.
I’ve battled my natural gullibility and laziness by surrounding myself with people better than I. What have you done?
I now know you must vaccinate your children, that homosexuality is not a choice and therefore they deserve every right that heteros have including marriage, and that women should have complete autonomy over their own bodies. I mean, I think I always agreed but now I know. Also 911 was not an inside job but was caused by religious extremism, man did walk on the moon and oil and coal production are fucking up our earth. Duh.
So if you’re looking to validate your opinions, maybe you should consider from whom you’re getting your information. Are they smart people who write in complete sentences with proper grammar? Are their statistics and/or test results from reliable trusted sources? Do they work in the open or in secrecy? Is your opinion based on current facts or projected outcomes? Do people look at you funny when you express them?
Girl Scout Cookies
Jan 23rd
There’s been quite the controversy going on with the Girl Scouts lately. You can look it all up, but the gist is Colorado GSA allowed a transgender 7-year-old boy to join their local troop. Other troops across America have been quietly doing the same. Then apparently something called HonestGirlScouts.com got all offended and one teen GS posted a video calling for a boycott of cookie sales because OMG! Boys in the Girls Scouts!!!!
Honestly, I don’t know shit about transgender people. I don’t think I’ve ever actually met one. But if you’ve opened your eyes at all lately you would see more and more differences in children are becoming… mainstream? Not quite the word I want. Out-of-hiding? Whatever, we can find out more about different people easier if we want. One of the things you can learn is few of these differences are by CHOICE.
By the time your child has a mind of their own, you know you can’t change them. If your darling daughter hates pink, no amount of paint and glitter will make them girly. If your son prefers to play barbies with the girls, no amount of punishment will make them a football player. Kids are what they are. I can only assume transgender is the far end of the tomboy or (what some people would call) sissy-boy spectrum. So it stands to reason if your son turns out to really, really want to be a girl, you should make their life as easy as possible. That’s our jobs as parents, right? To make our children’s lives as great as we can all the while teaching them not to be serial killers by killing their little souls. You can’t beat it away.
Some Girl Scouts get it. If the boy-born is to all intents and purposes a girl, then they are a girl. If your daughter feels more like a boy, then support that.
Why would anyone spend their entire parenthood forcing their child to be something they’re not? It’s not like these kids do it all just to piss you off. If your child wanted with all their heart to be something acceptable – like a figure skater or hockey player – you’d be damned sure out there getting them to practices, paying for lessons, freezing your ass off, whatever.
So anyway, this came up on my facebook, originally posted by HGS as reasons why you should boycott Girl Scout Cookies.
You can click on it to make it big enough to read if you haven’t see it yet.
I was a Girl Scout and a leader when my daughter was a Girl Scout. I think there are a lot of good things about Girl Scouts. And this stupid graphic makes me more determined to buy cookies in support of Girl Scouts of America. That is, if I hadn’t already ordered a whole case and I can’t afford more than that. If you’re local to me I can send you a link to a local GS I know and you can order YOUR cookies online in support of Girl Scouts today.
Don’t let the misinformed bigots win. Buy your cookies, and if you don’t want them – donate.
But I don’t KNOW yet!
Dec 27th
This happens a lot. Someone posts a link on twitter or facebook or what-have-you and click you go. As the page loads you get a glimpse of what the link is about when WHAM! Up pops a HOW DO YOU LIKE OUR SITE? survey window.
WTF?
I don’t know yet!
Somewhere the guy in charge of the surveys is wondering why nobody responds. Maybe it’s because I’ve never been to your site and I haven’t had a chance to check it out. This usually happens on newspaper websites but not always. It happens more often than not on the My HealtheVet where I have been often and have already responded to their survey.
Isn’t there some way to, oh I dunno, differentiate new or anonymous one-time hits from those who regularly visit a site? Yes I know there is. Wouldn’t your stupid survey get actual usable data from consistent readers? You’d think so.
But no, some idiot makes sure the first thing you see when you visit their site is a survey request that you can’t possibly answer honestly.
Way to go.
WTF is wrong with people?
Dec 12th
When did it become normal to change the way you do business because one person bitches? Or to cave to whatever some minority of your customers demands?
Case in point:
Lowe’s pays for commercials during a show called Muslims in America. I’ve not seen the show but I have seen the ads. Apparently Dearborn MI is a hotbed of normal people who happen to be Muslim, right? So they need a reality show? Okay, like an extended version of the …and I’m a Mormon ads. Whatever. Carry on.
Then Lowe’s pulled their ads because The Florida Family Association had their members send a bunch of anti-Muslim emails. BACKLASH blows up. Then some California state senator mentions he might call for a boycott against Lowe’s if they don’t apologize and re-run the ads. Poor Lowe’s. Who knew running a home-improvement empire meant you have to take a stand one way or another on Muslims? All Lowe’s wants to do is make money. I don’t shop there because they are anti-gay (and more expensive than Home Depot) but are they really anti-Muslim too? No, they ran the ads until they were pressured by religious bigots. Makes me wonder if their anti-gay history can be planted in the religious bigot garden too.
Another one: Alec Baldwin supposedly went a little nuts when a flight attendant wanted him to turn off his cell phone and now the flight attendant union wants the American Airlines to pull 30 Rock from the in-flight rotation.
Isn’t that a little much? Social media nightmare there. Nobody give a shit about Alex Baldwin making a fuss except the people who were there but let’s make a huge fucking deal about it.
I keep seeing more and more over-reaction to the squeaky wheel. Why is it companies are bending over backwards to keep the religious people happy? To keep any tiny portion of their customers happy? Just do your damned job and let people decide for themselves.
What happened to personal responsibility? If you don’t want to shop at Lowe’s for whatever reason then don’t. If you don’t want to sleep with people of the same sex then don’t. Stop getting offended over every little thing. Stop blowing shit out of proportion.
Stop trying to make everyone live the way you do.
Personally I don’t even notice which ads run during which shows. I don’t relate the plethora of Ford truck commercials to support of the message of any particular show. And though I have personal boycotts against certain companies I never expect anyone else to boycott with me or take any other action against them. I may provide information as to why I’m boycotting them but the decision is yours.
BTW Chik-fil-a is anti-gay too. Everyone should stop eating there. Seriously.
I’m kidding… but not about the anti-gay thing. If you really want to eat their food I won’t judge.
