so don't ask if you don't want to know
Religious Or Not
Wherein I blog about religion or lack thereof
An Example of Christian Conversation
Apr 24th
I’ve been in this ongoing conversation regarding gay marriage rights. (For your sake, don’t load that in Firefox as it takes forever – try Chrome.) Anyway, it’s your average back-and-forth between the Christians and the rest of the world. Actually, it’s more polite than usual even though I’ve been called an idiot and told I’m going to hell. Here’s a nicer comment:
Hi Debbie Walker, I understand that everyone wants to believe whatever they want to believe, but our constitution is clearly based on Judeo/Christian moral believes. I’m not trying to make the USA look like a Christian country by any means, but the institution of marriage comes from de God of the Bible, the only God, outside the ones we make ourselves to be in our lives as individuals (money, sex, golf, football…). So based on that, Christians have a right to stand for marriage as prescribed by God. We can’t avoid sinning against God, but changing the meaning of what marriage is, or sin is, is going to find opposition. Of course, as in most situations, the ones that oppose are demonized (bigots – homophobics, etc.). I’m not fretting about it. God is still in control, and I don’t fear whatever happens here on earth, in this short life. There is wrong and there is right… you and I know it from within. We can’t go by whatever every minority wants unless their rights are truly violated. At least we can express our opinions about it. I just hope and pray that those that call themselves Christians won’t fight about this. That they would just vote if it comes to it. That they would express their love for the sinners (as they are loved by God as sinners), and be carriers of grace, but most importantly, be carriers of the good news of salvation through Christ alone, who die on the cross for our sins.
And my response. I’m a little bit snarky, not because of his comment but because it’s just another in a series of better-than-thou misinformation that these people really believe:
Gee, it’s funny that way before any mention of your god came along from the aborigines to the American indians, from the pagans to the orientals, every societal group has had some form of marriage – a recognized committed relationship before witnesses. I don’t think you have the monopoly on what a marriage is.
And that’s the fine point. Way before there was a bible for these people to base their entire lives upon, there were societies from the smallest backwoods tribe to massive amounts of say, early Japanese that had never heard of Jesus or the Christian God. And they all had rules and punishments based on just treating each other decently. There were marriages, and punishments for theft or murder, there were various “laws” on property rights and commerce. All of the things that we call civilized have developed all over the globe without knowledge of the Judeo/Christian religions. Amazing! Maybe they had their own gods or maybe they just plain wanted peace and happiness and knew you had to have agreed-upon rules to accomplish that. Thou shalt not kill is not an original thought, y’all.
This one is closer to what responses I usually get:
Bob August: Debbie. Hepatitus A, B and C, HIV and any other STDs in our blood supply. How about the sexual molestation of children by these perverts. Have you ever heard of NAMBLA? “Sex after eight is too late”. They want seven year olds and you want to make them respectable. You deserve to have your children taken by these criminals!
(Bolding mine) So because I support gay marriage, I deserve to have my children raped? How very Christian of you.
Bob Baker: Debbie Walker Are you crazy not affect him it affects the whole country you idot. I am not a church goer but I know what perversion and immorality are. It is un-natural and is perverse.90% of child molesters are gay or lesbian thats a fact, because they are perverse.
People still really believe this bullshit. So I called him on it (as did others) and he doesn’t respond. Typical.
And then there’s the more recent conversation here. This story is about the MAAF (Military Association of Atheists & Freethinkers) asking the USAF to stop requiring bibles be placed in every room in on-base housing because it’s, you know, unconstitutional.
And of course the Christians can’t read and assume the MAAF wants the bibles themselves removed. Sure, it would be nice but that’s unconstitutional too. They just want the requirement removed, right? But the Christians just don’t get it. Over and over the comments are all about Christian oppression. Well, it IS a Christian website and the article is written by one of them so…
When the atheists or even those Christians who believe in the separation of church and state try to keep the comments to the facts, it’s the Christians who always start the name-calling. They can’t keep to the topic! Bringing in homosexuality and Nazis, and how this is a CHRISTIAN NATION! and everyone else should just leave or die or go to hell.
This is America…the founding fathers made this nation on Biblical teachings. The Bible is every part of this great nation. If you don’t like it..there is plenty of other countries out there you might like…and they are not doing near as well as this nation because they don’t follow Biblical teachings. GOD BLESS AMERICA!!!
Actually there are a lot of nations doing well without the overwhelming control of religion. Wander around online and you’ll see comments from Australians, Canadians, and Europeans where religion plays a very small part in their government and every day life.
No matter how many times you politely link to factual documents regarding the founding of our country they just don’t get it. And we usually try very hard not to link to biased websites with our facts. But they always, always come back with either bible quotes or links to bible-based websites.
Talking to these people is like trying to use logic with a 2-year-old in the middle of a temper tantrum. I just don’t understand the mind that has convinced itself the their God has a special purpose for the USofA and that we should all be happy to abide by it.
This is just a sample of the conversations I’ve been in lately. I keep trying to bring logic and reason and they still respond with LA LA LA LA I CAN’T HEAR YOU! But maybe someone does. Maybe I can reach one small mind and encourage it to think. I wish I were as eloquent as some of my fellow non-believers but I keep trying in my own way.
What is Heaven?
Apr 22nd
I’ve been told so many things in my life about this so-called heaven. Nobody seems to have any idea exactly what it is but they all seem to agree that it’s a great place.
In heaven you meet up with your deceased loved ones. And then what? What if great-grandma wasn’t such a nice person and you really don’t want to spend eternity allowing her to pinch you when she thinks you’re wrong? What if your 1st husband and your second husband don’t like each other and you’re stuck in the middle forever? What if it’s someone who loved you but you didn’t love? Are you trapped by their side or do you get to wander off. To where?
Everyone is deliriously happy and singing all the time, loving God and praising him… forever. Seriously? Does that really sound like something you’d want to do?
Do people who are born gay and have denied their gayness because they’re convinced they can’t go to heaven if they don’t get to finally be happy gay people in heaven? Or do they have to deny their predisposition forever there, too?
I just don’t see the benefit of the heaven I’ve been told about. Actually, most people who’ve discussed it have talked about getting there, not what it’s like after you’ve arrived. It’s like little girls dreaming about their weddings without a thought to the actual marriage.
Seriously, imagine being in a complete state of bliss every moment for eternity. Imagine the best orgasm you’ve ever had times infinity. You’d be happy for 10 minutes tops. After that it’s drudgery.
You can’t have good without bad. You can’t have interesting without boring. You can’t have life without death and when I die I just want to be done. I don’t want to go to heaven and I won’t because I’m an Atheist and I don’t believe in it so if by some bizarre chance there is one I don’t qualify anyway.
Personally I don’t know anyone who actually qualifies by their own rules. Everyone has a dark side, a prejudice or has committed some “sin” they haven’t admitted to. Some little bible rule they’ve decided doesn’t count or convinced themselves means something different.
So tell me what you think heaven is. I really want to know. What is this place you’re working so hard to get into? What do you expect when/if you get there? What have you been taught about heaven?
Why can’t people be good to each other simply because they should. Not for any heavenly reward but because it’s right. Why isn’t it just okay to have a great life and be done when you die? Do you really need a promise of heaven in order to be a decent human being? That’s so sad.
You started it!
Apr 19th
Right there in my reader this morning was Friendly Atheist’s post where he quotes from this video:
They’re bullies. And we know that we people stand up to the bully on the playground — the bully on the playground intimidates, that’s what he does, intimidates people into silence, into fear, into avoiding the bully. And oftentimes the bully is the paper tiger and when the righteous individual who is being bullied defends his or herself and punches the bully in the mouth, guess what, the bully more times than not has a glass jaw, falls down and then everyone on the playground says “whoa, the bully was a weakling after all.”
That’s the secularist left. The secularist left are bullies. They try to bully and intimidate and push religious intolerance and religious bigotry on everyone else.
WHAT. THE. FUCK! Religious people are the bullies in your little scenario.
If you want to compare the ongoing battle between the religious and the secularists, you might want to remember the bully then goes whining to the teacher. You’re whining. Because you can’t bully anymore, your previous victims are fighting back and not starting the fights. You whine because the downtrodden have rebelled. Look in a fucking mirror!
Secularists, atheists and even people who just believe different gods than you have been bullied for centuries. Right now in small towns and communities all over this country people are afraid to admit they don’t believe. They’re bullied in the most despicable ways. Read the stories in r/atheism where people are thrown out of their homes and disowned by their loving parents, they lose jobs, are forced to listen to the preaching and are constantly told “YOU’RE GOING TO BURN IN HELL FOREVER!” Which, actually, doesn’t mean anything to us other than your hate is so strong you would wish this upon another human being. Christian love, my ass.
We’re just punching your bully in the face to protect ourselves. We’re just plain tired of your shit. You have completely over-stepped your boundaries and we’re fighting back. You started it, just like your proverbial bully.
There is no war on religion. You can believe what you want in your churches and homes with people who choose to believe as you. Secularists just want you to keep your beliefs out of everyone else’s life. We’re fighting to stop religious-based legislation. We’re pointing out the fallacies in your “this is a Christian nation” lies. We want our free America back. Stay where you belong and out of our wombs, our bedrooms and our schools and we’d get along just fine.
In my family we have a saying, “Don’t poke the bull.” Eventually the bull gets tired of it and turns on you. Well the bull has turned and you deserve it, so quitcherwhinin.
Dear Arizona Legislature,
Apr 13th
Are you high?
Do you have any idea what you’ve done? Yesterday was a banner day!
By a vote 17-13, the Senate passed HB 2625. HB 2625 would allow any employer citing a religious objection to refuse to include birth control in insurance coverage for workers. Sure, women who want their birth control covered by the insurance they pay for can find another job but how possible is that in this economy?
The Senate passed 1359 21-9, which means doctors can’t be held liable if they lie or leave out information to their patients. Doctors not being honest with their patients about their health is a good thing, right? As if some people don’t already have trust issues with their doctors.
Governor Brewer signed 2036, making changes to current abortion laws, including banning abortions after 20 weeks except in a “medical emergency,” allowing doctors to prescribe medication abortion pills only through the seventh week of pregnancy which starts counting the first day of your last period. Adding on to this, clinics must post signs saying it is against the law to coerce a woman into having an abortion, physicians must provide additional information about health risks, and the state must create a website with abortion health risks, contact information for adoption agencies and photos or drawings of developing fetuses.
Seriously? That leaves a woman about a 2-minute window to make her choice. How do these things usually work? A girl misses her period (4 weeks) and maybe waits another week just in case she’s just late. Takes a OTC test and it says yes, she starts pondering – maybe talks to the boy – makes a doctor’s appointment (which may take a couple of weeks to get) and makes sure. We’re up to 6-7 weeks already, IF she’s keeping track, too late for the “abortion” pill, so she has to make the appointment for the more invasive type. That’s performed one day a week at the local clinic and she just missed it or they’re booked for a while, plus she’s broke and needs to gather funds. Cutting it a little close, aren’t you?
So where are the “information about health risks, contact information and photos” going to come from? Let me guess. The often-disputed anti-choice websites? It’s a proven fact there are more health risks from having an actual baby than those from an abortion. And exactly how many women are being coerced INTO having an abortion? More likely they’re being berated and shamed OUT of having one only to be left with this innocent child they didn’t want.
Here’s the thing. THERE ARE TOO MANY PEOPLE ON THE PLANET AS IT IS. Women should be applauded for controlling their fertility, not condemned. Do we really, truly want every woman to have no other choice but to plop out child after child that they likely cannot afford to raise humanely? These unwanted children will likely be raised in poverty relying on government programs. How many kids are in the system now? How many kids are raised by parents just fit enough to not have them taken away?
The same people who legislate fertility are the same ones who repeatedly cut welfare programs. Does that make sense?
Is the underlying purpose of these laws to make it impossible for people to have sex at all? After all, you can’t trust your doctor to provide information about avoiding pregnancy, your insurance coverage (if you’re lucky enough to have a job with such coverage) might not cover birth control and you can’t get it discounted when all the Planned Parenthood clinics are shut down. Then when you do accidentally get pregnant you can’t stop it AND you’re stuck with a child you don’t want and a society who looks down on you and refuses to help. Sound like a great place to you?
Hey, we’re all doing our best out here to have lives and live them with some sort of comfort and dignity. And occasionally have sex. Stop making it harder.
Love (not),
Debbie Walker
Dear Ann Romney,
Apr 13th
No matter how you try and twist her words, Hilary Rosen was right – in context. Nowhere did she say being a stay-at-home mom was something to be discounted. The point she was making was that you have never had to make that choice so you’re hardly the epitome of a woman who has had to make the hard choices most women have to face today.
I’ve been both a working mom and a stay-at-home mom, depending on the economy and my husband’s ability to make ends meet for the family by himself. Sometimes I didn’t have a choice. In my life our family has been homeless multiple times and we owned a home for a few years. Life for most women is a roller coaster of financial stability. You have always had that financial stability. You never needed to make that hard choice to leave your children with others and make a buck on your own. You don’t have the life experience to represent women in general. You live in a dream world.
I’m willing to bet you’ve always had health insurance (including dental *gasp*) and have never had to decide between making the mortgage payment and getting your kid’s teeth straightened. Well, my kids never got that choice. The few times my husband had a job that even had dental my kids were lucky to get checkups and fillings, period.
My children are grown and their financial stability is worse than mine ever was. My oldest son is raising a daughter on his own, working what is considered a great job but with no benefits. His daughter gets limited health care through the state. My second son is a married veteran going to school and neither he nor his wife have jobs. With one car and poor public transportation options it’s hard for them both to work. My daughter is a single new mother with no job. Where do the young go to find jobs that pay enough to cover child care AND the rest of the bills?
Your idiot husband seems to defer all women’s issues questions to you. Great plan for a supposed future President, right? The way he tells it, you seem to think all women care about is the economy and gas prices for our SUVs to take the kiddies to soccer practice.
Well let me ‘splain something to you. We don’t give a shit about gas prices. They are what they are on any given day, a minor blip. What we want is affordable health care. What we want is freedom to make decisions about our own bodies. We want equal pay for equal work. Come out of your rich lady bubble and look around. Walk up to women in their jobs (without someone prepping them first) and ask them what they think is important. Not pretty career women, I’m talking about the cashier at the grocery store… if you, you know, actually go into grocery stores. I’m talking about women police officers, women day care providers, women teachers. Women under incredible stress to keep their families under a decent roof, eating healthy meals and at decent schools. Women without rich husbands. And not just mothers. There are many women out there without husbands and children who would just like to make a life without constant daily struggle.
How many houses do you have? There are thousands of homeless women out there that would just like a safe place to sleep. How many people on your staff? Other women would love to have someone to clean while they’re at work but do everything a stay-at-home mom does plus work. How many cars do you have? My daughter drives her baby around in a clunker with bad brakes but to her (rightly so) it’s more important to spend what little money she has on food and rent than car repairs.
Pshaw on your stay-at-home mom claim. When you’ve gotten down on your own hands and knees to clean toilets every other day, when you’ve told your child you can’t afford new school clothes again this year or you discover you’re pregnant again and can’t even afford a doctor’s visit to confirm it and you certainly don’t want to add that burden onto the family you already have, THEN you can raise your stay-at-home mom claim. You? You’re just a rich lady who never had to make the hard choices.
Look, you’re fortunate to have a rich husband. You’re fortunate that you can do all that fancy shopping and hair and nail salon stuff. But there’s a reason the rest of us call you the 1%. You’re so far up your own pedestals you have no clue how the rest of us live. So shut the fuck up. You know nothing.
Get out, talk to poor people. Volunteer at a homeless shelter (without the press) and take time to get to know folks who actually work for a living. Spend an afternoon looking on the Internet for opinions that aren’t Republican. Take a walk on the dark side. Adopt an inner-city school and provide it with supplies and a visiting doctor. Fund vaccinations for the poor. Take 10 poor kids to a dentist for tooth repairs. Ask women who go to Planned Parenthood why they are actually there instead of listening to the rhetoric regarding abortion statistics. Get dirty. Spend a month without staff. Do something useful rather than pretending your patronizing prayers work miracles, because they don’t.
We both know you won’t.
Debbie Walker
Disable veteran, mother of 3, grandmother of 2
Dear Tennessee,
Apr 12th
If you want to know why other people on this planet tend to stereotype your residents as backwards, stupid or idiots, look at what we see coming out of what are supposed to be your best of show: your elected officials:
1. Updated Abstinence Bill. In a new family life instructions bill, holding hands and kissing could be considered gateways to sex. The bill prohibits teachers from demonstrating gateway sexual activity including health education models.
WHAT WE KNOW: There is no evidence to date that abstinence-only-until-marriage education delays teen sexual activity. Moreover, research shows that abstinence-only strategies may deter contraceptive use among sexually active teens, increasing their risk of unintended pregnancy and STIs.
You can’t fight hormones. You just can’t. It’s better to teach our youth how to protect themselves IF the
y get in a sexual situation than to send them out every day blind. Duh. Hugging is a gateway to sex? Really?
2. The “Monkey” Bill. To prevent school administrators from reining in teachers who expound on “alternative hypotheses” to the scientific theories of evolution and climate change.
WHAT WE KNOW: Science is a systematic enterprise that builds and organizes knowledge in the form of testable explanations and predictions about the universe.
Creationism or “intelligent design” is not science. Because the bible says so is not testable proof. Our planet is billions of years old, plants and animals (including humans) have evolved and though climate change is inevitable in nature, man has/is having an effect on our current climate.
3. The Life Defense Act of 2012. Directs the state Health Department to post on its website a report on every abortion, to be filled out by the facility where the procedure takes place. The reports must includ
e the “identification of the physician who performed the abortion and the physician’s office, clinic, hospital or other facility where the abortion was performed,” according to the official summary of the bill. Although the bill states that patients will not be identified in the reports, it says the documents must include the woman’s county, age, race, marital status, plus her number of prior pregnancies, number of prior abortions, the gestational age of the fetus, and her preexisting medical conditions.
WHAT WE KNOW: Abortions are legal in the United States of America.
What really gives you the right to collect and publish information on a legal medical procedure? Maybe the next bill should be about erectile dysfunction procedures. You don’t need a hard-on anymore once your quota of kids is planted, do you?
Anyway, this is an example of why people across the world think of you – and by association the rest of the US – as backwards. Please stop. You’re making us look bad. Put down the bible and research some real science.
————
Now I’m not saying we here in Arizona are any better as we have our own elected idiots in office. I’m just picking on Tennessee today. Tomorrow I may point out other states with backwards thinking… like mine.
Stereotypes
Apr 4th
Today’s FUCKed up parenting story:
Girl forced to run 3 hours dies
The gist of the story is a 9-year-old was forced to run for three hours as punishment for having lied to her grandmother about eating candy bars. In the heat, in Alabama.
There are many conclusions you can draw from the little article based on these key words:
- double-wide trailer
- dirt road
- bi-polar and alcoholic
- Alabama
Where does your mind go? What assumptions do you make based on stereotypes?
Then there are the comments. *sigh*
I’ll tell you what, it appears to me grammar ability can be correlated to religiosity. I graduated High School but never went to college and I can put together fairly decent sentences. Sure I don’t have perfect grammar but I’m well above the average Internet commenter, especially the religious ones. Just read through those comments! Or comments on any story with god people and you see they are often barely comprehensible. And I’m stereotyping based on my own observations.
So you have the guy who states the obvious statistical probability.
Trailers, booze, and let me guess, probably a lot more religion than brains.
Followed by over a hundred comments on just that line alone. He’s offensive/he’s likely right. From god saved the child, then god didn’t save the child from the pain but she’s in a better place now, to there is no god. There’s the usual MY religion wouldn’t hurt a child that way so they can’t be real christians followed by those who snarkily point out the bible says it’s fine to kill your own child for misbehavior.
Way more stereotypes based on a small article that actually doesn’t say anywhere the religious preferences of the FUCKed up parent. More assumptions.
We all make assumptions based on what information we get and often we end up being right. But there are times when people get railroaded on the Internet based on that same small amount of information. There are still questions about what happened to Trayvon Martin. All over the web both sides are posting semi-related “information” about the boy, about Zimmerman and even about the police there. Where is the truth? Speculation and out-right lies. I mean somebody has to be lying.
What if Trayvon wasn’t the stereotypical young black man in a hoodie? What if he was a good boy doing no wrong? What if the young girl above was a brat and lied all the time and this 3-hour run was an extreme punishment after several attempts at other corrections? Or was she a constantly abused innocent with a masochistic grandmother.
The point is, we don’t know the whole story. The Internet has become a shouting match for people’s opinions based on stereotypes and personal history.
Take a second next time you type up your outraged comment. Do you really know the whole story or are you just blurting out based on your own stereotypes?
Yes, there is a war on women.
Mar 21st
Those Republicans seem to be on a roll. Just within the last couple of weeks:
- AZ State Representative Terri Proud thinks women should be forced to watch an abortion before they’re allowed to get one. (Then watching ANY medical procedures should be mandatory before you can get one)
- AK State Representative Alan Dick thinks women should be forced to get signed permission from the “father” before they can get an abortion. (You’ll have to wait until we find that rapist/one-night-stand/married guy)
- AZ thinks women should have to justify their birth control decisions with their employers.
- TN wants to publish abortion doctor names and most personal information about women getting abortions.
- ID Assistant Senate Majority Leader Chuck Winder thinks all women should be forced to get ultrasounds before an abortion, even raped women because “I would hope that when a woman goes in to a physician with a rape issue, that physician will indeed ask her about perhaps her marriage, was this pregnancy caused by normal relations in a marriage or was it truly caused by a rape. I assume that’s part of the counseling that goes on.”
- TX passed the ultrasound law without even making the rules clear.
- CO House of Representatives has passed the “First Degree Homicide of an Unborn Child” bill, but it might not pass in the Sate. (Hey Doc, what are you in prison for? I performed an abortion on a young lady who was raped by her step-father. My bad.)
- No Republicans voted to renew the Violence Against Women Act.
There are more examples every day. Apparently women have gotten too uppity with all that freedom and need to be slapped back into the kitchen to be barefoot and constantly pregnant. Men have complete control over their own reproductive decisions but women don’t deserve the same rights? I recently read (but can’t find now) an article about a bill allowing doctors to HIDE information about a fetus if they think the woman may abort based on that information.
Women know when they’ve been raped. Women know when they don’t want a child or even a pregnancy at all. They don’t abort because the child might be one sex or another or because of race issues, they don’t want the child at all. Why are women being forced to carry a child they don’t want?
If men got pregnant this wouldn’t be a discussion.
I just don’t understand the mind-set that decides women are chattel that must be controlled. Are Republican women so meek they can’t or won’t stand up for their rights?
Little a versus big A
Mar 14th
For a long time I just didn’t care. I avoided religiosity and kept quiet when I couldn’t. It didn’t matter to me what those people did as long as they did it elsewhere. I’d explored various religions over the years and none of them made any sense to me. You believe this stuff on faith? Really? OK. Whatever.
I was a little “a” atheist.
For the record, an atheist is simply someone who doesn’t believe in gods. Period. Nothing else.
I think there are a lot more little “a” atheists out there than we realize. People who don’t have anything to do with any religion yet haven’t made a stand, a commitment to Atheism. Since I’ve “come out” loud and clear, I’ve had a few friends tell me they’re thinking of coming out too. I’ve had several other people tell me at least I’ve made them think about their choices. I’m willing to bet my regular readers are thinking about their choices more.
But now I’m just sick of it. I’m sick of those people interrupting my regular life. I’m sick of those people making laws intruding on everyone else. I’m sick of the hypocrisy, the double-standard, the women-controlling, gay hating, I’m automatically better than you because I believe in some speshul ree-ward after I die therefore I-can-force-people-to-do-what-I-want-while-I’m-here-ness of it all.
That’s why I post articles about those people’s FAILURES to be decent human beings. That’s why I speak out.
I have become a capital “A” Atheist.
I don’t care what people do in their own homes. If you want to pray and/or have gay sex it’s all the same to me. I do care if you want to pray in government buildings. Religion belongs in homes and churches or even special events set aside just for that (see Matthew 6:5-6) not out where non-religious (or other religions) have to tolerate it.
Nobody is trying to stop you from practicing your religion where it is appropriate. Religions, especially Christian religions (all 20,000 plus versions of it) have held a monopoly in recent years. Now that secularism is fighting back Christians are crying foul! They, having been in the privileged position since the 1950s, feel it’s their due to run rampant over everyone else and that’s just too bad.
This is not a Christian nation. If the founding fathers had wanted it to be a Christian nation they could and would have made it very clear when they wrote the damned Constitution. The exact words are
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;
That means no government entity, no matter how small, can establish/support a specific religion. But it also means you can’t be stopped in your religion as long as you stay out of government. Government includes schools, town meetings, courts, etc. You can’t have the mayor get up and lead a prayer to Jesus or Allah, you can’t have a teacher preaching creationism in science class, and you can’t stop after school atheist groups from assembling if you allow any Christian groups. And back off the whining about the billboards and the threats against people who question your religion. It’s called free speech, people.
That’s all outspoken Atheists want. For religion to stay where it belongs – in private – and let everyone else live the way they choose.
Little “a” = don’t really care.
Big “A” = prepared to fight back against the religious storm.
Sex and Religion and Marriage
Mar 10th
Let me start this off with a little family story:
#2 son dated a girl from a Mormon family all through High School. I didn’t meet the mother until much later but one day after they’d been together for about a year I received a phone call. This woman proceeded to berate my parenting skills because she’d just found out they were having sex! Let me say, if you’ve spent more than 10 minutes with #2 son you’d know he – like me – is a very sexual being. So after this woman went on and on I finally interrupted her with this:
“At least all my children have the same father.”
Yes, that was mean but true. She had at that time at least 5 children by at least 3 different men, all long gone. I think she had a couple more kids after that! I honestly don’t know how many of the fathers actually married her.
I’d had sex conversations with #2 from the time he was 12. I had a giant economy box of condoms in the hall closet. I had sat son and girlfriend down a few times and discussed safe sex. I never allowed them to go at it at home, but I knew they were doing it somewhere. That is responsible parenting. Not ignoring the possibility all the while screwing every man in sight and dropping puppies like spare change and going to church every week to what? Put on a good show?
Another story.
We had a neighbor who had married for the second time. Our daughters were and are still great friends. She came home one day and her Mormon husband told her he didn’t want to be married anymore and she had three days to move out. Swell guy. So now she’s married a third time in the Mormon church and as far as I can tell is miserable and lonely in a small town up north.
My aunt and uncle were Catholic and had 5 kids and continue to fuck like bunnies for as long as I can remember. We’d be at their house for a visit and they’d just disappear into the bedroom for a romp. Awesome, right?
Religious people have sex. I’m not even sure it’s just vanilla sex, I’m betting they get into some pretty kinky stuff.
Sex is natural, sex is good, not everybody does it, but everybody should.
As long as it’s consenting adults taking proper precautions to avoid STDs and pregnancy unless they want babies, right? Even older teenagers. Let’s face it, from 15 up sex is the number one thing on their minds. It’s natural! What’s unnatural is denying it. Abstinence is a proven failure.
Religious people have a big problem with masturbation. Religious people have a big problem with birth control. Religious people have a huge problem with any kind of porn. Religious people have a big problem with sex outside of marriage.
Why?
I cannot imagine wedding night virginity and being stuck forever with someone you’re not sexually compatible with. You wouldn’t buy a car you expect to have for 4 years without test driving it! You wouldn’t by a house without seeing it first. Hell, some people won’t order a new food without taste-testing it.
We’ve all been with someone who turns out to be completely incompatible in the bed. Imagine if you had to marry them first to find out. Ugh.
Marriage should be a complete commitment to someone you know well and will love forever, or at least a long time.
I don’t understand the religious obsession with other people’s sex lives. We know they’re doing it so why can’t they just let other people alone. Push safe sex instead of abstinence. And masturbation relieves sexual tension enough to allow clearer thought when looking for a mate so it’s a good thing, right?
There are religions that don’t allow women to leave the house without being completely covered. A woman can be beaten to death just for speaking to a man. In religion it always seems to be the woman’s fault for tempting men. Women are sluts for wanting to have sex. In religion men take little responsibility for unmarried sex, yet they are the ones making the rules. And who are the slutty women having sex with? Men! If virginity were as easy to prove in men as it is in women would it be as valued?
And don’t get me started on the religious and gay people!
Here’s the thing. I respect marriage. Marriages were around way before religion and will be around long after the last god is forgotten. But marriage is simply a commitment between people who want everyone to know they’re together. Mostly for legal reasons to put a finer point on it. I’ve known people in committed relationships without marriage. I respect the commitment. Marriage is not some magic covenant. If it were there would never be adultery or divorces. Men should not be able to use marriage to control women. They should be equals. And it certainly should NOT be entered into without knowing your partner completely.
Which takes us back to sex. I’m not saying you should screw indiscriminately, though you can if you want. You should take responsibility for your own safety surely. You should be able to get access to condoms and pills and procedures whatever else you need to be responsible. And though one-night-stands are a step better than masturbation, you should see sex as a part of a relationship rather than the be-all and end-all of it.
And it shouldn’t matter to anyone else. If it does you should ask yourself why.
