so don't ask if you don't want to know
Amusing and/or interesting
Stuff other people might find funny or just mildly interesting.
Is it just me?
Jun 10th
I’ve notice it about a dozen times in the last two weeks and it’s seriously starting to freak me out.
What?
Oh yeah, I’ll be multitasking – watching TV while puttering around on the Internet – and coincidentally (let’s hope it is coincidentally and not some bizarre other world attempt to drive me over the edge) I will read a word and at that EXACT SAME TIME someone on TV says the same word.
I can’t cite all the examples, but it’s happened enough times that I stop and say whoa every time now. Last night it was “advantages” on The Daily Show at the same time I read “advantages” on a Jezebel article.
Today’s example takes the cake. Kira decided to listen to a kid’s music CD today for a change instead of the usual TV shows and halfway into the CD is Mary Had A Little Lamb. As it started playing this popped up in my twitter feed:
“Mary Had a Little Lamb” on the Les Paul Google Doodle. http://goo.gl/doodle/lQlkN Booyah!
Whoa. Fucking Twilight Zone moment!
This shit is really creeping me out. Do you ever notice it?
Voyagers!
Jun 6th
I haven’t thought about this show in years. I remember a discussion with my boys when they were younger about blanks in a gun and another conversation with someone about the hottest male actor EVER!
Then my friend Tee Morris posted this picture 
today and I recognized the Omni
immediately! I don’t know where he got it, that’s his story. But I loved that show. Early 80′s show, Jon Erik Hexum (Yum) was an inept time traveler assigned to “fix” wrongs in history so he grabs some history professor’s kid (Meeno Peluce, remember him?) and drags him along as a little human fact-checker.
I put it in my Netflix queue, but I’m pretty sure it won’t hold up to my memories of it. Maybe I loved it because JEH was the prettiest man I’d ever seen, or maybe it was a halfway decent show. I’ll find out soon enough, but I wanted to share this today. Go look at all those pics, you have to agree he was yummy. Too bad he wasn’t real bright. I’m going to need to stock up on popcorn before these start showing up.
Rat’s Nest
Jun 4th
There was a time, 20-odd years and 2.5 kids ago, that I paid a bored neighbor woman $30 a week to clean my house (laundry, dusting and vacuuming mostly) because I worked and had a horribly long commute. She wanted spare cash and I couldn’t keep up with it all myself. Casey was just a toddler then so evenings and weekends were better spent doing other things than cleaning.
Now that I have Kira overnight maybe a couple times a week and my house is a wreck I’m seriously thinking about hiring someone to come in and clean up after her. This kid has more crap at my house than at her own! And yes, she usually cleans up (mostly) after herself when I ask, but sometimes we don’t have notice when she’s being picked up and BAM she disappears and leaves everything out.
As I sit here (in my laziness) my coffee table is covered in coloring supplies and snackage mess. There’s still pink bedding on the couch and the floor THE FLOOR is covered in a plethora of stuffed animals and small toys. Plus books, stacks of children’s DVDs, and little clothing in various states of dirtiness. We had 5 minutes notice yesterday that it was time for her to leave so no cleanup occurred.
*sigh*
I don’t want to clean it up, but – although I’ve never been a spotless housekeeper – I can’t stand it! My natural lazy side is warring with my natural organizational side. I have a meeting in an hour so I can’t start on it now so I’ll have to come home to it, just like last night when I ignored it after #EVFN. How many other activities can I find today so I don’t have to come home and clean? It’s the floor that daunts me. Bending over a million times or crawling around? IDONWANNA!
Damn kid. No, damn my own lazy ass.
Balticon!
Jun 1st
Thursday morning I got stabbed on the way to the airport. Actually, there was a wedged plastic sword in Sheila’s garage and it caught my arm just enough to leave a mark. Flight to Baltimore was uneventful – I sailed through old-fashioned security while Arioch went through the super-sonic x-ray machine and will never have children and Sheila got up close and personal with a TSA agent while Evo recorded it for posterity. Picked up by Rob at the airport in Baltimore for the car ride to the not-Baltimore Balticon. Checked into my hotel-across-the-street and headed to the con.
Immediate hugs from some, not recognized right away from others. People pleased to see me. I was definitely pleased to see them. Especially Bruce and Julie, and A. Thursday evening and Friday day were SiglerFest dedicated to all that is the FD∅™ and Dark Øverlord Media. Siglerfest was cool and I won a Surly! Then we all went to dinner and then back to the hotel for drinking, where I caught up with more old (and new) friends. Donna and A and Sheila and I… never did spend enough time together.
JC Hutchins didn’t recognize me at first and neither did Tee or Mur. I didn’t think I looked that different with this shorter darker hair and new glasses but apparently I do. Also found MAinPA and many many other people I’ve known online and now IRL.
So… lots of drinking, talking, walking, panels, drinking, eating, drinking, laughing (oh the laughing) and just spending quality time with some of the people I like most in the world. Friday night was the awesome George Hrab and Triologic playing (pics and video on my Facebook) and Sunday night was DinerCon after we closed the bar. DinerCon was awesome, though Evo spent most of it over-intoxicated in Donna’s car. There were lots of people providing him with drink all night and he just couldn’t say no. Poor baby. I recorded on my phone but I haven’t had a chance to download it and see if it’s presentable.
Monday morning was full of bittersweet goodbyes and promises of future connections.
The plane ride back wasn’t bad just odd. They didn’t like my name at the curbside, and even after scanning my ticket at the gate, they called my name on the plane to make sure I was there. Then when I got home I found they’d searched my checked bag. 
And let’s not forget my cankles! For some reason my ankles swelled up so bad I could barely get my shoes on. They’re only this morning back to normal.
Anyhoo, I had a BLAST. My hotel – though across the street and therefore a PITA to get back and forth - was awesome! The Con was mediocre, but I had so much fun with my friends and new acquaintances. I can’t wait til next year!
Oh wait, I forgot to mention Phil Rossi’s band Ditched by Kate. Interesting logo, but the band was so not my kind of thing. I escaped almost immediately once they started playing.
False support demon
May 31st
There’s a conundrum we all face. We have friends that are creative in various ways. Those friends write books, make music, blog, bake or start new businesses – and we as friends want to be supportive, right?
But what if although you like or love a person but feel kind of meh or even dislike their product? Should you LIKE their work despite your actual feelings? Even further, should you spend money buying their product when you don’t even like it or have any use for it?
Moral dilemma #289. 
I do, when I can. But I get this twinge of hypocrisy when I don’t actually like whatever it is. I take pride in being honest but most people don’t appear to appreciate honesty when it comes to their passion. It’s only my personal opinion but when I’m asked what I think and I say (as tactfully as I can) what I think it seems to hurt their feelings. It’s MY failure to connect when I don’t like your music or book or whatever, not YOUR failure. Should I – as most people are pretty adept at – come up with false praise?
Damn, I hate being a hypocrite but I hate hurting my friends more.
And yes, I’m curmudgeonly. I don’t “get” a lot of things. I don’t like a lot of things. But I think that makes it more genuine when I do. I like person A’s music but I don’t like person B’s but aren’t we all like that? I can think of tons of music I don’t like (and I’ll bet you can too) but when it’s created by someone you know are you supposed to fake it? I never say they’re doing it wrong just that I don’t care for it, but that still seems like a slap in the face. I’m not creative, but creative people seem to take my dislike of their art personally instead of in stride, knowing not everyone in the world will like what they do. I still like THEM.
So should I fake it to be supportive (which I usually do when it comes to someone’s art) or stick to my avoid hypocrisy/be honest policy?
Integrity sucks sometimes.
On the other hand, there are times I like something but can’t stand the creator. I don’t want to support the person because they’re a dick or whatever but I really like what they made. Like, she’s a bitch but damn these cookies are excellent!
At least I try things and not dislike out of hand.
So I go through life with books I’ll never read again, music I skip over, podcasts I just delete without listening, etc. because they were created by friends I want to support and not hurt their feelings.
BTW you creative friends reading this? Don’t ask if you don’t wanna know.
Whatever happened to manners?
May 22nd
I volunteered for an event this weekend. This isn’t about Ignite Phoenix (which was kick-ass) but about some of the people attending.
My job was to greet people coming in one of the doors and to hand them the program and quickly and cheerfully explain it was a conversational cootie-catcher they could fold up and use to socialize with their seat-mates. Easy peasy.
There were three types of people coming through that door.
- 10% People I actually knew who smiled back and chatted for a moment before moving on.
- 30% People who accepted the program and smiled back, possibly commenting about the ingenuity of the program.
- 60% Snotty-ass people who brushed past me neither making eye contact or acknowledging me at all.
The whole atmosphere of an Ignite Event is socializing, igniting ideas and just being open for new experiences, right? It’s certainly not your usual Scottsdale upper crust la-dee-dah ignore the help thing. I may have passed people on the street handing papers out without acknowledgement, but usually I at least say no thank you. And I certainly wouldn’t ignore someone inside a building wearing a t-shirt with the event logo prominently displayed on her chest. Rude!
So this is to the rude people out there. Ignite Phoenix (as well as any Ignite out there) is staffed by VOLUNTEERS. From the lowly program pusher to the emcee, from the tech people making it look and sound good, to the t-shirt and program designers, nobody gets paid to do this. We volunteer because we believe in the event. Your lousy $10 ticket doesn’t entitle you to treat anyone like the help. In fact, nothing entitles you to treat anyone like the help. As far as that goes, many events in the Phoenix area are organized and staffed by volunteers that deserve your respect for taking time out of their already busy lives to make these events the very best they can.
Take a split second to acknowledge the people providing you with priceless services and entertainment and you might just get more out of them. Don’t be rude. It only makes you look like crap.
About May 21st
May 17th
If you don’t know what the deal is by now, come out from under your rock and pay attention to the world for five minutes.
So for me, I haven’t yet pinned down my feelings completely. There’s a part of me that of course laughs at the gullibility (stupidity?) of some people, following along and especially ridding themselves of their worldly goods and campaigning on the word of one person. They sort of deserve what they get when nothing happens, and yet they don’t. People that gullible should be protected?
Another part of me wishes I had the charisma to start some false religion and get people to give me money and goods and treat me like I was something special. In turn I’d slowly and carefully turn them from anything biblical and eventually leave them high and dry and yet… smarter.
And yes, there is a teeny tiny part of me that thinks that if ANYTHING happens, at least that would answer the damned question already. Not that I would or could or even want to go to heaven. I cannot imagine anything more boring or eternally annoying to be stuck with religious zealots who’ve been proven right. I’d rather stay here or go to hell with the interesting people.
Different Atheist boards I read are coming up with all kinds of ideas. From staging a rapture to freak out a fundie friend (mean) to sincere volunteering to care for pets of those who are sure they are going to be raptured rapturized taken (humane). I’ll just probably sit back and chuckle.
Either way, I’m fairly confident I and everyone else who plan to attend Girls Night Out Saturday night will be there and ready to get their fun on.
And y’all will still be around as well. In fact, I can’t think of one person I know who’s acceptable by their rules anyway.
Chip chip chip
May 14th
It occurred to me just now that when your friends post requests for you to vote for someone they know for some random award or contest it chips away at your integrity to follow through.
Don’t get me wrong, I posted a request just a couple of weeks ago for my friend’s daughter in a radio contest. In my mind I thought if they wanted to people could peruse all of the entrants and could choose H’s video. Or just save time and pick hers to be nice, which is what (as if anyone did) most people would do.
You see it all the time on twitter and facebook. Just now someone put out a request for his friends to vote for his cousin to get Teacher of the Year somewhere. I barely know him, I don’t know her so my vote is bogus, right? Does the fact that he has bunches of loyal friends voting make her, in fact, Teacher of the Year worthy? Maybe she IS the best teacher on the planet, but how do I know?
Sometimes we put out or respond to the requests thinking we’re doing a good thing to help someone, but isn’t it cheating? Does everything have to be a popularity contest dependent on how many friends and friends of friends you have?
Fine, it’s a minor thing (unless you’re the other guy in the contest) but I can feel it’s chipping away at our collective integrity under the guise of social media friendship.
@msemphasis raises her glass to @pink
May 10th
It’s cute how the earworm in the 4-year-old’s head is @Pink’s Raise Your Glass. Except she didn’t have the words just right so I pulled up the video to listen to over and over. It’s the first time I’ve seen it and it’s AWESOME!
I want to ask so many questions! Like what was the most fun part to do, the sumo wrestler or feeding the calf? Who’s idea was the whole women’s breast milk for the calf anyway? I can’t decide what is my favorite part! I love the waking up with different religious icons too.
So Kira and I were dancing around the living room singing to Pink. And although I’m pretty sure a 4-year-old and her 50-year-old grandmother are NOT in her demographic I’m absolutely sure Pink wouldn’t mind.
Oh yeah, I opened a twitter account for Kira. She’s not such a SmallChild anymore so her new online name is @MsEmphasis.
EDIT: Someone pointed out my earwig/earworm mistake. I blame it on the bifocals.
50 is fantastic… so far!
May 2nd
Oh. My.
Well, my birthday celebrations actually started the Friday before the actual date but other than the residual bruising on my boobs, I was ready to continue.
Last Thursday was #EVTM so I went up to Liberty Market to hang with that gang and received even more birthday wishes. I have such good friends!
Friday I got up and finished packing, took myself for my free birthday breakfast at Liberty Market – yes, it’s THAT good, you go two days in a row when you get the chance – and then picked up Krystal to get the rental car. After a rough start because car rentals at the fucking airport aren’t set up for local people and we blew half an hour trying to find the right place, we scored a Charger and went back to her place and loaded up the car with their stuff. Picked up Max, had lunch and finally got on the road to VEGAS BABY! Made it to the Stratosphere just in time to get decked up, gather the troops, pre-drink and go out.
Because CJ met us there and both she and Krystal (and I) love karaoke I decided we’d go a half-block away to Dino’s Lounge. Yes, it was a dive bar but aren’t those the best places for Karaoke? We had a BLAAAAAST! Max and Casey and his friend Jeff got up and sang Happy Birthday (so did everyone else in the packed bar) and then CJ sang my favorite CJ-sings-Karaoke song, The Homecoming Queen’s Got a Gun, to which I got up in my drunken way and cheered her on. Then Krystal rocked Shoop. I flirted with the numerous guidos around me and got as drunk as I’ve ever been. I must’ve had 8-9 vodka cranberries throughout the night. Everyone had a great time!
Unfortunately Vegas was experiencing a surprise cold spell and we froze our asses off walking to and from the bar. Nobody brought warm clothes except maybe CJ. We’re idiots.
Speaking of guidos, Vegas is overrun with Jersey Shore wannabes but damn do they dress nice and smell good. Lots of flirting and leaning in close, but that’s all. Most of those young men were tolerant of this old bat so it’s all good.
Saturday started with buffet breakfast with CJ, Crystal O’hara and her daughter Colleen (see, I remember her name now) and Shannon – then Max and Krystal eventually showed up. Us girls then headed to the outlet mall where I tried on 6 bras and started crying cuz I can never find a bra that fits right. Poor CJ was so patient with me. Then back to the room for a nap after which we dressed up and met at Nine Fine Irishmen for the BEST DINNER EVER!
I had the cider braised salmon (with a couple of ciders) and it was fantastic. Other than the food, I don’t think anyone was really enjoying the experience so we split up and went our separate ways.
Ended up back at my hotel and made CJ walk all the way to the HOT TUB!!1 only to find out they close the pool area at 6pm BOO! Who the fuck closes a hotel pool at 6pm? The Strat, apparently. So we went back to my room and dressed up again and went up to the Air Bar at the top of the tower, where the evening disintegrated even further. I’m drinking the whole time, but still. We were all getting tired and cranky by then so I gave up and went to bed.
Sunday morning we all gathered once more to watch Casey take the leap from the top of the tower. There’s video of that on my Facebook page if you want to watch.
So… there were down moments but it was mostly way up. I had the best time ever, wore make-up *gasp* and Krystal made my hair look great! I got to flirt a bit, got plenty drunk and spent a really great weekend with my sons and friends. We’re planning another family trip in November when Ginnie turns 21 and can go along.
Awesome start to my year 50!
