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Amusing and/or interesting
Stuff other people might find funny or just mildly interesting.
Deserve?
Apr 2nd
So many words are losing their specialness. You hear “hero” bandied about all the time. Hero is getting washed of it’s impact. Not everyone who is tagged a hero really is one, but then again everybody at some point in their life could be a hero. What is truly heroic? I think being a hero is tied to an event where you put your life on the line for someone else. A bystander jumps in the river to save a child, that’s heroic. Firemen, soldiers, cops, people who put their lives on the line every day as a matter of fact are not as heroic. Or maybe they are.
For some reason the word “deserve” keeps popping up in my radar. “You deserve” this or “you deserve” that. It just rings bells in my head whenever I hear it.
deserve
to merit, be qualified for, or have a claim to (reward, assistance, punishment, etc.) because of actions, qualities, or situation: to deserve exile; to deserve charity; a theory that deserves consideration.
“You deserve a better life.” Hell, we all deserve a better life, right? What makes one person more deserving than another? It just makes me cringe every time I hear it. On TV, man tells woman she deserves to be safe. We all deserve to be safe! Doctor tells child he deserves to be healthy. We ALL deserve to be healthy. Every time I hear the word I immediately wonder what make that character more special than the guy next door and it’s usually nothing more than being human.
My niece has had a rough life. She’s already fought cancer once and doesn’t deserve this second battle. But how did she deserve it the first time?
“You get what you deserve.” What the fuck does that mean? We usually think of that line when some nasty person has bad luck, but bad luck happens to good people too.
Damn that word annoys me.
If a person works hard they deserve a raise. If you do something special you deserve a reward. If your kids are acting out in public and you do nothing, you deserve contempt by the people around you. It’s supposed to be a cause and effect thing, not everyone deserves whatever they want.
Geesh.
Brilliant idea for an app.
Mar 30th
How often does someone say, “remind me next time I go to X that I should pick up Y.” Aunt Sarah has your best pie plate. You need a new pill cutter pretty soon. Or you want to remember that diner next time you’re downtown.
But you don’t want to make a special trip, not with gas at $4 a gallon.
Isn’t there some way to combine a text program with a gps? You could enter a reminder note and an address or business name and next time you’re near it up pops a text!
You could call it Mental Note.
Inner v outer beauty
Mar 29th
I read this today about 2 women who usually get all gussied up every day taking 2 months off. No makeup, no shaving, no hair coloring, etc. It all started with one woman talking to the girls from her Girls on the Run group.
“So many times, a little girl will say ‘If you tell me I’m beautiful just the way I am, why do you color your hair or wear makeup?’ “
Yes, why do we?
I don’t normally wear makeup. It’s too expensive and I’m not really comfortable in it. Maybe for special occasions? A little makeup to enhance is fine. I do color my hair because I’ve been going grey pretty much since I was a teenager and it’s not even a pretty grey. Think battleship. Before I started coloring my hair in my mid-thirties people often thought I was much older. Now people always think I’m younger than I am though I never lie about my age. I’m 50 and proud of it. I just look… better.
I’ve known women who get their hair and nails done on a regular basis. One old friend constantly bitched about lack of money yet never missed a hair or nail appointment. Then again she was ginormous and almost every conversation included “when I lose my weight I will…” but as far as I know she’s still the same size. I went once to get a pedicure and likely will never go again. It all seems like such a waste of money if you don’t have money to waste.
Now the ladies in the article stopped shaving anywhere and stopped using deodorant at first. The deodorant was quickly added back into their hygienic routines but still no shaving. Shaving your pits is usually necessary, though I’m sure lots of women out there don’t. As long as you don’t stink, fine. I’ve talked about shaving before. But what is so wrong with wrinkles? And clean nicely shaped nails are just about all a person needs.
So how much beautifying do we really need? I watch these anti-wrinkle commercials and other ads to cover up and make your skin look like porcelain. I don’t have wrinkles (I guess I’m lucky) but I don’t think I’d worry about them if I did. Why is the standard for women to cover up anything that is natural? It’s your skin and supposed to be that way! How much of this crap do women pay good money for and use religiously just because we’ve been fed this bullshit that we should all look like perfect plastic dolls? What’s wrong with freckles? And what is the fascination with eyebrows? Unless you’re blessed with an overabundant uni-brow there’s no reason for the ridiculousness going on with eyebrows!
How much money do women waste because we’re constantly told NORMAL is a level of beauty we can never hope to achieve?
There’s a difference between enhancing what you have and turning yourself unrecognizable every day.
I just don’t get it.

About #storiedwedding
Mar 24th
My friends Katie and Tyler are getting married tonight. I remember Tylerthedouche before he met Katie and he’s such a better person now. Apparently a good woman CAN do wonders for a man.
Their wedding is kind of different. I think he’s wearing toe-shoes and she’s likely to be in a sundress. They met through social media so most of the planning has been online, open to all. Quite a bit of crowd-sourcing!
Another friend Corey just posted his list of things he hopes doesn’t happen on their wedding day (that may or may not have happened on his) so here’s mine:
- When the hairdresser found out who the bride was marrying, she proceeded to tell her stories about how she and apparently the receptionist AND the shampoo girl had fucked the groom in high school.
- Best man borrowed a fancy car for our “limo” and nobody told him the gas tank leaked so the car sitting outside the side door made the entire church lobby reek of gas.
- Flower petals ordered turned out to be a small bouquet so flower girl was crushed. She’d practiced tossing petals for days!
- Groom’s brother (usher) sported a black eye after a poor ending to the bachelor party.
- Half the groom’s family pissed at the other half of the groom’s family, hence the black eye.
- Bride’s mother vocally unhappy about bride’s father bringing his new wife, her ex-best-friend.
- Plywood dance floors in the not-quite-finished small town “country club.”
- Best man puking in the back seat of the “limo” shortly before we left for the night.
- Wedding night spent at the Detroit Metro Airport Hilton (paid for by bride’s ex-boyfriend) where the fruit basket consisted of one apple and one orange sliced up on a paper plate.
High class, I’m telling ya. One good thing was a beautiful sunset behind us for great pictures.
If you want to follow Katie and Tyler’s wedding, watch twitter for the #storiedwedding hashtag and go to their wedding website.
———————————-
I’m going but I’m having a personal pain problem so I probably won’t be there long. I barely lasted an hour at Katie’s bachelorette party last night. Damnit.
Yes, there is a war on women.
Mar 21st
Those Republicans seem to be on a roll. Just within the last couple of weeks:
- AZ State Representative Terri Proud thinks women should be forced to watch an abortion before they’re allowed to get one. (Then watching ANY medical procedures should be mandatory before you can get one)
- AK State Representative Alan Dick thinks women should be forced to get signed permission from the “father” before they can get an abortion. (You’ll have to wait until we find that rapist/one-night-stand/married guy)
- AZ thinks women should have to justify their birth control decisions with their employers.
- TN wants to publish abortion doctor names and most personal information about women getting abortions.
- ID Assistant Senate Majority Leader Chuck Winder thinks all women should be forced to get ultrasounds before an abortion, even raped women because “I would hope that when a woman goes in to a physician with a rape issue, that physician will indeed ask her about perhaps her marriage, was this pregnancy caused by normal relations in a marriage or was it truly caused by a rape. I assume that’s part of the counseling that goes on.”
- TX passed the ultrasound law without even making the rules clear.
- CO House of Representatives has passed the “First Degree Homicide of an Unborn Child” bill, but it might not pass in the Sate. (Hey Doc, what are you in prison for? I performed an abortion on a young lady who was raped by her step-father. My bad.)
- No Republicans voted to renew the Violence Against Women Act.
There are more examples every day. Apparently women have gotten too uppity with all that freedom and need to be slapped back into the kitchen to be barefoot and constantly pregnant. Men have complete control over their own reproductive decisions but women don’t deserve the same rights? I recently read (but can’t find now) an article about a bill allowing doctors to HIDE information about a fetus if they think the woman may abort based on that information.
Women know when they’ve been raped. Women know when they don’t want a child or even a pregnancy at all. They don’t abort because the child might be one sex or another or because of race issues, they don’t want the child at all. Why are women being forced to carry a child they don’t want?
If men got pregnant this wouldn’t be a discussion.
I just don’t understand the mind-set that decides women are chattel that must be controlled. Are Republican women so meek they can’t or won’t stand up for their rights?

Little a versus big A
Mar 14th
For a long time I just didn’t care. I avoided religiosity and kept quiet when I couldn’t. It didn’t matter to me what those people did as long as they did it elsewhere. I’d explored various religions over the years and none of them made any sense to me. You believe this stuff on faith? Really? OK. Whatever.
I was a little “a” atheist.
For the record, an atheist is simply someone who doesn’t believe in gods. Period. Nothing else.
I think there are a lot more little “a” atheists out there than we realize. People who don’t have anything to do with any religion yet haven’t made a stand, a commitment to Atheism. Since I’ve “come out” loud and clear, I’ve had a few friends tell me they’re thinking of coming out too. I’ve had several other people tell me at least I’ve made them think about their choices. I’m willing to bet my regular readers are thinking about their choices more.
But now I’m just sick of it. I’m sick of those people interrupting my regular life. I’m sick of those people making laws intruding on everyone else. I’m sick of the hypocrisy, the double-standard, the women-controlling, gay hating, I’m automatically better than you because I believe in some speshul ree-ward after I die therefore I-can-force-people-to-do-what-I-want-while-I’m-here-ness of it all.
That’s why I post articles about those people’s FAILURES to be decent human beings. That’s why I speak out.
I have become a capital “A” Atheist.
I don’t care what people do in their own homes. If you want to pray and/or have gay sex it’s all the same to me. I do care if you want to pray in government buildings. Religion belongs in homes and churches or even special events set aside just for that (see Matthew 6:5-6) not out where non-religious (or other religions) have to tolerate it.

Nobody is trying to stop you from practicing your religion where it is appropriate. Religions, especially Christian religions (all 20,000 plus versions of it) have held a monopoly in recent years. Now that secularism is fighting back Christians are crying foul! They, having been in the privileged position since the 1950s, feel it’s their due to run rampant over everyone else and that’s just too bad.
This is not a Christian nation. If the founding fathers had wanted it to be a Christian nation they could and would have made it very clear when they wrote the damned Constitution. The exact words are
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;
That means no government entity, no matter how small, can establish/support a specific religion. But it also means you can’t be stopped in your religion as long as you stay out of government. Government includes schools, town meetings, courts, etc. You can’t have the mayor get up and lead a prayer to Jesus or Allah, you can’t have a teacher preaching creationism in science class, and you can’t stop after school atheist groups from assembling if you allow any Christian groups. And back off the whining about the billboards and the threats against people who question your religion. It’s called free speech, people.
That’s all outspoken Atheists want. For religion to stay where it belongs – in private – and let everyone else live the way they choose.
Little “a” = don’t really care.
Big “A” = prepared to fight back against the religious storm.
Censorship
Feb 27th
BAM this morning in my feed there are two separate articles on censorship, though for different reasons.
First there’s Evo’s link to ZDnet‘s Paypal article:
On Saturday February 18, PayPal began threatening indie book publishers and distributors with immediate deactivation of the businesses’ accounts if they did not remove books containing certain sexual themes – namely, specific sexual fantasies that PayPal does not approve of.
And then Friendly Atheist has a post about YouTube pulling “religiously offensive” videos with little notice.
First of all, private businesses can set guidelines and do what they want when you break those guidelines. I get that. BUT…
When you are the place, the #1 go-to for eCommerce or shared creativity then you have a certain responsibility to be transparent and fair.
Make the rules clear. None of this we-might-not-like-what-you’re-doing-today bullshit. If you want to say “we won’t support bestiality stories” then say that.
Know the difference. There’s is a HUGE difference between religious criticism and hate speech or between illegal sexual acts and fantasy ones. I find many religious videos on YouTube offensive but unless and until they’re hateful I don’t act offended. When something is obviously wrong (like when reddit killed the r/jailbait subreddit) it’s pretty clear, but fantasy stories about having sex with a guy who happens to turn into a wolf are hardly bestiality. Any content with consenting adults involved should be allowed.
Allow mediation. If content is reported as offensive then have some sort of compromise position between ignoring it and deleting it. Get independent opinions. If 600 people like something and 3 people complain, consider the source.
Either stand behind independence or cave to the offended and make it clear to everyone else what side you want to be on.
YouTube, eBay, Facebook, flickr, Amazon, PayPal… we all love these #1 companies because they’re like the WalMarts of the Internet. They’re the big boxes we default to because that’s where people are looking for content. Sure there are alternatives – but who knows them? And with power comes corruption, I know that. But the Internet needs to keep its independence and those providers need to take that responsibility to heart.
And people? People need to stop thinking of their own personal feelings and really consider before clicking that “report” button. Is it hate speech or do you just not like it? Is someone really hurting another person or are you just too uptight. Do you really need to report something as offensive or can you just never go back to that content again? If you feel NOBODY should EVER have to innocently come across that story or video feel free to report it, but if it just makes you feel squidgy then move along.
When you don’t know
Feb 24th
I’ll be the first to admit I don’t know everything, that I’m lazy and that when it comes to research I generally stop after the first 3 pages on Google.
So how do I form my opinions? I surround myself with people who are smarter than I and who are passionate about being informed – and I listen to them.
Usually.
I have a friend Dani who feeds me links to political stuff, I visit the Skepchick blog for skeptic and science and women’s issues. I have a feed from Jezebel that – although it’s mostly celebrity fluff – sometimes has very good editorials on women’s issues, politics and bluntly calls people out. I check out r/atheism though most of it is just mean but occasionally someone posts something funny or important. And I adore the Friendly Atheist.
I have real life friends whose opinions matter. My friends are generally atheist or science-minded, are for equality for all races and sexual orientations, and are just plain intelligent. They can put together complete sentences, are entrepreneurs and are always trying to better themselves and their communities.
What I have learned in the last few years? Here are a few keywords:
Citations. You don’t pass along information unless you trust the author and even then you make a cursory search to verify. I don’t believe something unless I can find it from a trusted source – which is a big step for my gullible self. So many of my previous opinions have been changed by considering the sources.
Collaboration. People are more successful if they work together. Which is why I love Gangplank, Podcamp/TechPhx, WordCamp, and Ignite. All of them are regular people working together (usually for free) to offer their experience and knowledge to those around them. I volunteer so much of my time to these organizations because I’ve learned so much and want to share.
Credit. The people around me are sure to give credit to those who help them. They refer, they review, and they make sure everyone is thanked. I need to work harder on thanking people.
Positivity. *sigh* I’m naturally a negative person so this is harder for me. If you can’t say anything nice and all that. I’ve had so much positive reinforcement from my friends that I’ve GOT to get better at passing that along.
Change. As I said above my opinions have changed on many subjects. You have to be open to change. If intelligent learned people think your opinion is whacky, then chances are you need to do more research and find out if you’re right.
I’ve battled my natural gullibility and laziness by surrounding myself with people better than I. What have you done?
I now know you must vaccinate your children, that homosexuality is not a choice and therefore they deserve every right that heteros have including marriage, and that women should have complete autonomy over their own bodies. I mean, I think I always agreed but now I know. Also 911 was not an inside job but was caused by religious extremism, man did walk on the moon and oil and coal production are fucking up our earth. Duh.
So if you’re looking to validate your opinions, maybe you should consider from whom you’re getting your information. Are they smart people who write in complete sentences with proper grammar? Are their statistics and/or test results from reliable trusted sources? Do they work in the open or in secrecy? Is your opinion based on current facts or projected outcomes? Do people look at you funny when you express them?
Why I Vote for Obama
Feb 23rd
Well… one reason anyway.
You can read the entire excerpt here but this is the part I like:
Moreover, given the increasing diversity of America’s population, the dangers of sectarianism have never been greater. Whatever we once were, we are no longer just a Christian nation; we are also a Jewish nation, a Muslim nation, a Buddhist nation, a Hindu nation, and a nation of nonbelievers.
What our deliberative, pluralistic democracy demands is that the religiously motivated translate their concerns into universal, rather than religion-specific, values. It requires that their proposals must be subject to argument and amenable to reason. If I am opposed to abortion for religious reasons and seek to pass a law banning the practice, I cannot simply point to the teachings of my church or invoke God’s will and expect that argument to carry the day. If I want others to listen to me, then I have to explain why abortion violates some principle that is accessible to people of all faiths, including those with no faith at all.
Exactly.
Throughout this excerpt he admits he’s some sort of a Christian, though he’s not on any particular bandwagon. Still searching or not quite ready to go completely to the religion dark side:
This is not to say that I’m unanchored in my faith. There are some things that I’m absolutely sure about—the Golden Rule, the need to battle cruelty in all its forms, the value of love and charity, humility and grace.
Spam Spam SPAM!
Feb 21st
I have this blog set up so I can peruse the spam before it deletes and occasionally I come across one that’s kind of interesting. For instance:
I don’t write a comment, but after browsing a few of the comments on TechPhx Kickoff Meeting! | Telling it like I see it. I actually do have a few questions for you if it’s allright. Is it simply me or does it look like like some of the comments appear as if they are left by brain dead visitors?
And, if you are writing on other places, I would like to follow you. Could you list of the complete urls of your shared pages like your Facebook page, twitter feed, or linkedin profile?
Grammar aside, this cracked me up. First, this is a spam comment on this post and you’ll notice there are NO COMMENTS at all much less any from brain dead visitors – unless you count the 5 spammers on that post. Like saying shit about the other people here will, you know, make me want to check out your link?
Secondly, my facebook, twitter, AND linkedin are linked right on my blog page, dumbass.
7,522 Loser spammers at this time. Why can’t these idiots get a real job?









