so don't ask if you don't want to know
Archive for December, 2009
Welcome to the Deadbeat Club
Dec 27th
I accidentally answered the phone the other day and encountered the dreaded bill collector.
May I speak to Gerald?
There’s nobody here by that name.
May I speak to Debra?
This is she.
Oh, but you don’t know who Gerald is?
Yes I do but he’s not available at this number.
Do you know a number where he might be available?
Nope, we’ve been divorced for almost three years and I don’t have a number.
Blah blah blah, she exhausted every question possible about how to located him or if I knew where he was working or how much he made, etc. Then she started in on me and I gave her the barest minimum in responses.
(Here comes the good part.)
She: So after your necessary bills you have about $1000 left over a month so you could afford to make some sort of payment on this debt, right?
Me: Not really, I still have other bills and I do have to eat.
She: Well, what do you spend your money on? Cable TV and Internet? Eating out all the time? You could go with the basic plans and save money and stop going out and wasting money.
Me? Seriously? You’re suggesting I sit in the dark and eat Ramen so I can afford to make payments on a vehicle I no longer have? What kind of good-effort payments did you have in mind?
She: Even $25-50 a month would go a long way in clearing up your credit.
Me: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG IT WOULD TAKE TO PAY OFF $14,000 WITH $25 A MONTH PAYMENTS? I’d be dead of boredom and starvation long before the first grand was paid off. No thanks, my credit is so far down in the crapper that the world’s best plumber couldn’t dredge it up.
She: So I should just put you down as refusing to negotiate?
Duh.
My position on being a deadbeat: It’s the business or bank’s responsibility to NOT give me credit. If they’re careless enough to throw away their money, why is it my responsibility to give it back? And with interest? What a rip-off! I made enough car payments to pay off the actual price of that car. It’s not my fault they chose to apply my payments to their interest scam first, and then when the car exploded and got ran over and repossessed it wasn’t worth enough to get the rest of their money. Price of doing business, yo.
Now with people it’s different. I hand someone money and I never expect to get it back, then when I do it’s a bonus, right? If someone hands me money and it’s a loan, I pay them back as soon as possible. (Thanks Mom, did you get my check yet?) People are people and I don’t renege on people. Just businesses.
Anyway, I told her not to bother calling me when she got further down the list and found the loan on his truck that we defaulted on too. Let it go beyotch, we ain’t paying. Blood out of a turnip and all that.
Illness Update
Dec 24th
As if you care.
Okay, some of you care. Thanks!
Anyway, as of right now I don’t feel any congestion in my chest, though deep breaths ache and coughing hurts – which is typical with chest problems and asthma. Hopefully that will pass. My lower back still feels as though a hatchet is embedded across it and the coughing jerks me around and I wanna scream, but I have no voice left from coughing and moaning.
I just need a really good cough medicine, and Dayquil ain’t cuttin’ it anymore. Must send GirlChild out for some supplies.
Last night I planned on going to the VA this morning to see what they can do for me, but the very thought of getting dressed and dragging my ass out to the car and into the hospital depresses me. I dunno whether to go to their emergency room or to my regular clinic for a walk-in. Either way, I just don’t want to.
I miss Kira. Casey came by the other day and she stayed on the other side of the room and looked at me with huge eyes. “Get better Grammi so I can hug you.”
I don’t have any Christmas plans. Traditionally we have pizza on the Eve and open one present, but I haven’t shopped yet. The trip to FL was my present to the kids, but I wanted to get something for Kira. We haven’t done anything special for Christmas Day in a few years. The kids have always had significant others they wanted to spend the day with. At this particular moment I just don’t care. Take pictures and call me later.
Very Bah Humbug.
More Bull Under the Guise of News
Dec 23rd
The last few mornings I’ve been watching the Today show. And no, I don’t think the Today show is news. It’s infotainment. What I do expect to be news is the short bursts of time they send the show back to the local affiliates. I expect local weather updates – which I usually get – and local traffic updates – which I also usually get. What I don’t expect or appreciate is the so-called serious interview with the local security expert outright selling his alarm system while the blond chickie earnestly asks pertinent questions with just the right amount of serious reporter intent.
It’s bullcrap. Magazines put a disclaimer at the top of advertisements because so many are designed to look like actual articles. If the local affiliates are using this as advertising revenue they should say so, not put it out there like it’s an actual interview. And yes, there’s a difference between this staged serious interview and the happy on-air reporter guy hanging out at the bakery because they’re giving out discounted cookies today.
I'm siiihiiihiick
Dec 21st
I can’t stop shivering though I’m wearing long Johns and in bed under my heaviest comforter. I’m Dayquilled cuz I’m out of Nyquil.
Can’t stop coughing and my throat feels like fire. My chest feels like Smallchild is sitting on it and I can’t get a decent breath.
Wanna pass out. Wanna call paramedics. Want this damned medicine to kick in.
This typing thing is actually helping. Takes my focus off my breathing and slows it down. Stops the panic.
Hey the shivering stopped. Still cold tho. Getting sleepy.
Is this the hini flu?
Hope tomorrows a better day.
trying to post from droid
Dec 20th
Today was a great day…
Other than my laptop being completely fucked and pulling something in my lower back.
Took Kira to breakfast with Santa.
Got some of the outside decorating done.
Went to another “Slumber Party” and didn’t spend a dime.
Went to karaoke at Kirk’s with good friends.
Made it home safe.
Also got the car checked and oil changed this week for $5.
Found the free computer here at the complex to use.
Sent the money to Mom that I owed her.
Got hit on at Kirk’s by some guy who I probably wont call.
He seemed like an OK guy, just jobless and living in downtown Mesa, which usually sends up a “halfway house” vibe. There’s a pretty large contingent of pedophiles and other sex offenders living in downtown Mesa. But the attention was a little ego boosting.
G’night.
The Indomitable Brandy
Dec 14th
I normally don’t mention people in my blog that I like unless I clear it with them first. People I don’t care about are fair game. And when I didn’t have a chance to chat much with my other niece I didn’t really want to mention her here. But apparently I hurt her fweelings so here she is:
I barely know her. Too many years went by with that disconnection with my sister, and Brandy and Brittany never got along, and well… I have a soft spot for Brittany because she lived with me for years and that’s not really fair to Brandy so here she is all grown up and being a sweet as a tater to me. Poor kid got the short end of the stick from her Mother’s family because most of us can’t stand her Father. That ain’t right.
Hi Brandy! We should talk more now that you’re actually all grown up and a human in your own right. You turned out pretty cool.
Love actually,
Crappy Aunt Debbie
Vacation: What Else We Did
Dec 14th
Spent a couple of days at Dad’s until I just couldn’t stand the fleas anymore. Poor old guy. For whatever reason they don’t bite him so he didn’t notice how bad it was. I have flea bites on both legs and arms and across my chest. And Casey had to repair the toilet in the back bathroom too. Dad never uses it so the old thing just crumbled from the strain of all of us. Apparently all the guts just disintegrated.
- Dad is watching Hannity. I get extra points for keeping my mouth shut.
We’ve never agreed politically. We just don’t talk about stuff because every time he opens his mouth I cringe and laugh and he’s so damned serious about his opinions! Republicans.
We spent a couple of days at Mom’s too. She mentioned she had a TV in the trunk of her car so Casey tried to install it for her, but she decided that flat screen wasn’t big enough so they traded up. This comes from a woman who is so old school she never even had a VCR. Oh right, there was a new DVD player to hook up too. And what is the only DVD she bought in preparation for it?
- Someone kill me. Mom is jamming to Gaither Gospel Hour Christmas in the Country. Seriously, how did I come from these people?
Mom likes gospel. When the fuck did that happen?
We went back to Dad’s to finish up fixing the toilet:
- My father has provided my children with moonshine. Things are getting more interesting.
Strange night. Dad was uptight that I’d posted that and I tried to explain that anyone who follows me doesn’t care and would cheer them on and that nobody is going to hunt him down for breaking the law. Moonshine law? Who the fuck cares? Casey and Ginnie weren’t impressed by it anyway so after one drink we left. No, I didn’t try it.
As tourists, we went to the beach and watched these guys try to dig out a backhoe that had tipped over. Kira played (hands and feet) in the cold gulf water until she turned blue and we finally left. The next day we went to Mote Marine and saw sharks and turtles, jellyfish and a dead giant squid, manatees and dolphins. Kira’s convinced the dolphins were talking to her. Driving to Mote we passed some sand sculptures that had been there a while. Lots of pictures in my flickr feed so check those out.
Did another elderly breakfast thing. You have to do one of these sometime. You sit at long tables and eat stale donuts while they do park announcements, introduce visitors, sing some old songs and raffle off prizes. Three of them. Casey won $7 and Ginnie and I both won SBA dollars. Luck of the draw! Quaint. Casey went out to Bingo with Mom one night and to a casino on another.
The kids think Mom is great! She’s funny and nice and pays for everything, but they don’t have the history I do. Can I forgive and forget the years of verbal and physical abuse, being told everything I do is wrong and stupid, the sarcasm… and just accept her as she is now? I don’t know. My sister holds a grudge like nobody’s business but when it’s convenient for her she acts like nothing happened. I don’t think I hold a grudge as much as hold people accountable for their actions. If they own up I’m all about forgiveness. Food for thought.
Bill is the same, blows up in nastiness at the slightest provocation, hates black people, yells at Mom over his own inadequacies, etc. She keeps saying this or that food will kill him and I keep suggesting she let him eat whatever the hell he wants, preferably that which will kill him, hello?
- Raining again. The so-called sunshine state has sucked for sunshine this whole trip.
- Son, convinced Krystal is White Castle, has sidelined us in a cheeburger frenzy. After tasting, I’m not impressed.
- Interesting name for a salon: Whack-A-Do.
- 24 miles and we’re in Louisiana. Kids are debating New Orleans on a Friday night. It’s 40 degrees and raining so I vote no.
- 100 miles to Texas. Can’t wait! I just LOVE Texas! /sarcasm
- fucking Texas has the women’s potty locked for the night.
- Found potty. Switched drivers. At mile marker 822 now. *sigh*
- I’ll be passing @aranel13‘s house in a minute, too early again. Should we kill time til she wakes or fuggedaboudit?
So we left for home on Friday. Casey and Ginnie wanted to stay longer but Kira and I were done and it’s my goddamn car. We tried to meet up with @aranel13 on the way back through the Houston area but apparently she sleeps until noon or something. Hey, it was 8am this time instead of the 6am on the way out but still not late enough. We stopped at the Alamo for a while but drove straight through the rest of the trip.
- I miss my friends. Almost out of Texas and should be home late tonight.
- 50 miles to AZ! So tired. Love having multiple drivers.
- Quick shopping stop for fireworks at Borderline Outlet. Guy closed early so I called him and he reopened. Yay Droid!
- Hello Eloy. You look familiar. I do believe we are getting close to home.
- Home.
Vacation: The Meat
Dec 14th
When we dropped Ginnie at Brittany’s apartment, Scumbag wasn’t there. B looks like shit and ranted about her mother and step-father and even my Mom and how everyone is against her and she doesn’t even understand why they took her son. When they came for him she specifically told them she didn’t want her mother to have him and yet he went straight there, so Beth must have started the whole process and knows people and so forth. She’s always been such a drama queen. I don’t believe she’s in any real danger, she just blows shit out of proportion.
One of the first things I told B was that I wouldn’t lie to her and I wouldn’t lie for her and that she needed to stop lying to herself. She was responsible for her decisions and that she needed to get her shit together. I told her we were there for her but there wasn’t much we could do unless she was ready to make big changes.
And because Scumbag was supposedly gone for the weekend, I let Ginnie stay there.
When we went to my sister Beth’s house she had a houseful. Her in-laws were there, her step-daughter Mandy and her guy and their baby, plus my BIL Mark – who I’ve never liked. 
There was this whole polite civility about the whole visit. Beth joked and chatted with us like there hadn’t been YEARS of silence from her. Not much about Brittany but it was obvious that they think Scumbag is the entire problem and B has fallen under some sort of control. So we just focused on Damien and spent an hour getting to know him. He and Casey really hit it off.
Throughout the week we did end up meeting Scumbag Dan. After all the talk about how mean and hateful he is and how intimidated they seem I was surprised as hell by how little he is. Dude is like 4’2″! Wheeny! But apparently a bit on the crazy/stalker/creepy side and it’s “what he’ll do” if they cross him. Casey and Ginnie spent way more time around him than I did. But we all came to the same conclusion: Nothing can happen until Brittany dumps his ass and works on getting her son back. She’s deluded herself that everyone is against her because that’s what he says. And slapping Dan around – because he doesn’t deserve a real man’s punch – won’t do a bit of good until B decides to leave him. I managed to make a couple of snide comments about how a REAL MAN takes care of his children and gee, maybe getting a real job instead of spending hours trying to get over on the system or applying for SSAN and grants because he has sooooo many issues. Yeah, mental ones. But he didn’t say shit to me and I didn’t get a chance to get all up in his face. Pity.
And Damien (or Gabriel as Beth and Bunch insist on calling him) is fine where he is.
We spent another hour at Beth’s on our way out of town and the baby’s Ad Litem was there as well. I did mention a few major points that B had like she wants her parents drug tested because supposedly Mark abuses pain killers and I know my sister has had her own issues with drugs over the years. I also mentioned that B is confused by the rules and what she has to do because Scumbag rattles shit in her ear almost constantly. STFU Dan seems to be what everyone wants to say.
I wish we could have stayed longer and that I had somewhere to dump Kira so we could get all confrontational. It’s hard to start a fight with her underfoot and NO WAY would she stay with Mom or Dad. Personally I think Dan is all bullshit and if we had more time and could lean on him we could get him out of the picture pretty easily. Then again I didn’t see him go off so maybe he is fucking crazy. Either way, it’s up to Brittany. I told her when we left everyone in her family loves her and is trying to help and to stop burning those bridges just because they’re not doing it the way SHE wants.
Whatever.
Vacation: Nawlins and Finally Florida
Dec 14th
So Friday morning we decided that as a treat for getting out of Texas we’d stop in New Orleans for lunch. Again with a couple of taps on my new phone we were directed right to where we wanted to go. Someone had suggested a nice restaurant around the corner from Bourbon Street, but we opted for the much cheaper pizza place next door.
Casey managed to find a drink and Ginnie and I enjoyed some of the old architecture before Kira got bored and started getting into trouble. Time to go.
- Stopping in Pensacola for the night. Can’t stands me car no more.
- Spent the night in Pensacola. Now if I can get these lazy slugs moving. I’m thinking about a more scenic route today.
- Kira practicing her evil laugh in Destin FL.
She’d been so good the whole time in the car. On the radio which was actually turned down pretty low because we were talking, someone did a muahahaha. Then Kira entertained herself for a good half hour muahahahaing to herself til she got it just right. We couldn’t stop laughing.
- There should be a law that it can’t be freezing cold at the Beach.
- For some odd reason this package of unscented baby wipes smells like old dead Budweiser.
- SmallChild has decided the lyrics should be “We will we will rock n pooh rock n pooh!”
So I’d been stupid. Really stupid. We discussed taking the scenic route down the Gulf side instead of staying on the Interstate. There are some beautiful little towns on that route around Panama City and Destin. It took us WAY longer than I had anticipated and then once we gave up it took even longer to find our way back to the highway. And the weather was horrible – pouring rain and fog. We got into Bradenton around midnight and Brittany begged us to let Ginnie stay with her so we had to find her place, drop Ginnie off and got to Dad’s quite late for him.
Got up and met Dad’s girlfriend Bonnie. I really like her. Then we all went to Sunday breakfast at Dad’s Eagles Club and then on to my sister’s to see the reason for the trip in the first place, Damien Gabriel.
